


On the Way Home

by AnnaFirestone



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Battle of Hogwarts Aftermath, Canon Compliant, Character Study, Eventual Romance, F/M, Ministry of Magic (Harry Potter), Originally Posted on FanFiction.Net, POV Percy Weasley, Percy Weasley Being an Idiot, Percy Weasley-centric, Personal Growth, Second War with Voldemort, Slow Romance, Weasley Family Dinners (Harry Potter)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-02
Updated: 2020-07-07
Packaged: 2021-03-04 06:28:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 19
Words: 39,907
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24509164
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnnaFirestone/pseuds/AnnaFirestone
Summary: The musings and the life journey of Percy Weasley from 1996 to the Second Wizarding War's aftermath. Eventually canon-compliant romance.
Relationships: Audrey Weasley/Percy Weasley
Comments: 30
Kudos: 42





	1. A Pawn in Their Game

**Author's Note:**

> Hello everyone!  
> I've wanted to write a character study about Percy Weasley for a long time, so there we go :)  
> The chapters' titles are inspired by song, this chapter's title is inspired by the song "Only a pawn in their game" by Bob Dylan.  
> DISCLAIMER: I regretfully don't own Harry Potter, otherwise I would make a TV series out of it.  
> Reviews are appreciated :)

**18th and 19th June 1996**

Percy Weasley was so tired that he didn't even feel like reading.

With a sigh, he put " _A Comprehensive History of Magical Transportation_ " by Ulysses Goodway back on the night table without having read a single page. The book was indeed terribly interesting but he was so exhausted that he couldn't keep his eyes open.

It had been another very long working day.

The Ministry hadn't had a moment of peace since that _infamous_ mass breakout in Azkaban six months before. The Daily Prophet kept asking for updates, witches and wizards from all over the country sent owls and even Howlers non-stop, complaining because the Ministry didn't do more.

Percy snorted: did the people _really_ believe that those dark wizards would let themselves be captured in a few months? Sirius Black was still at large after three years, now another ten dark wizards were running free!

But that wasn't all. Percy wished that the mass breakout were the only problem. No, the cherry on the cake arrived on April 21st, when Albus Dumbledore had gone into hiding after hexing the Minister for Magic, his Senior Undersecretary and two Aurors!

 _Dumbledore_.

The man he had once called the greatest wizard in the world, whom he had admired despite his many eccentricities, the man who had appointed him a Prefect and a Head Boy.

Now this man was pretending that He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named was back, scaring the whole wizarding world based only on the words of a fourteen years old boy.

Percy felt really sorry for Harry Potter because he was sure that he didn't lie purposefully. The boy had witnessed his parents' murder, spent years living with a Muggle family who made him sleep in a cupboard under the stairs and on top of that he had witnessed the death of a fellow schoolmate during a tournament he wasn't even supposed to take part to. No wonder that he had nightmares, heard voices and was terrified by Dementors. No wonder that he had associated Cedric Diggory's death with his own memories of He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named. No wonder that he imagined Dementors where there weren't any. This was obvious to anyone and certainly to Dumbledore too.

Dumbledore was _manipulating_ an unfortunate fourteen years-old boy! He was _plotting_ against the Ministry of Magic with that Order of the Phoenix of him. Worse: he was _recruiting underage students_ , who were too young an too much in awe of him to escape the brainwashing!

Percy shook his head. At first he had wanted to believe that his former headmaster was just getting senile, that it wasn't his fault. But then he accompanied Fudge and his Aurors to Hogwarts after the so-called Dumbledore's Army had been discovered, and he was forced to change his mind. Dumbledore knew perfectly well what he was doing, he was purposefully conspiring against the Ministry! Merlin knew how long he had been planning that!

But even more than by Dumbledore, Percy was disappointed by Professor McGonagall. She had been his role model at Hogwarts: clever, confident, serious about schoolwork and rules and disinclined to joke, yet kind and caring behind the no-nonsense attitude. She had been everything he wanted to be... and now she was siding with a plotter. On that infamous night at Hogwarts, she _stood by Dumbledore_ and even threatened to fight against the Minister Fudge and his Aurors! Percy had been utterly shocked.

Of course, it was very hard for the teachers to distance themselves from Dumbledore. The older ones like McGonagall, Sprout and Flitwick had been at Hogwarts for decades. Dumbledore himself had been Headmaster for almost forty years and had been teaching at Hogwarts since 1901. Percy understood that it must be very distressing for his former teachers to turn away from Dumbledore.

But at some point even the most staunch of Dumbledore's supporters _had_ to see that the man was running amok!

Not to mention the staff's _unreasonable_ attitude towards Dolores Umbridge! At first, Percy had understood the staff's mistrust of her: she was, after all, a newcomer without teaching experience and as such her advice was likely unwelcome. But that didn't justify the staff's openly hostile, even mutinous behaviour! At first he had been dubious about her 'theory only' approach to her subject but he had to change his mind after the Dumbledore's Army was discovered. Those ill-advised kids were looking forward to fighting against the Ministry, to follow in Dumbledore's footsteps. And Percy was ready to bet that those Dumbledore's Army's children included his siblings.

He turned over in his bed with a deep, shuddering sigh. He was awfully worried for them.

He knew perfectly well that his parents and his brothers who were of age had joined the Order of the Phoenix, they had discussed it several times before Percy left. He had no idea where the Headquarters were and who the other members of the Order were, but he was willing to bet on some of his former teachers and the Auror Alastor Moody - another delusional guy, he thought with a scoff. He had never informed Fudge, though.

Contrary to what his father believed, Percy was not going to sell his family, to see his parents and sibling handed to the Dementors - because that was what they were heading for.

He shivered and turned over in his bed again.

His parents and his older brothers were trying very hard to get a one-way ticket to Azkaban, just like that Sturgis Podmore bloke who had been trying to break in the Department of Mysteries. And his younger siblings were going to follow suit!

After hearing of Podmore's arrest, Percy had spent a sleepless night worrying about his family. They were risking Azkaban just because his father followed blindly an egotistical old man and a mentally disturbed boy! It was after that sleepless night hat Percy had decided to contact Ron. He had thought that maybe he could save at least his younger siblings before it was too late. But Ron had never written back - he probably believed Potter's delusions too.

Percy had briefly considered writing to Ginny, but Potter had saved her life in the Chamber of Secrets and it was no mystery that she had a crush on him, she was not going to be reasonable. There was no point at all in writing to the twins, it was not like they had ever listened to him!

Percy turned over in bed for the umpteenth time. The idea of his family at the hands of the Dementors made him sick. Maybe he should have tried to reason with them before he left, to show them how wrong and mislead they were.

But _no_ , his father had already made up his mind - and doomed the whole family, including his younger siblings. That was the reason why Percy had decided not to visit him at St. Mungo's hospital, despite knowing that he was badly hurt. Only Merlin knew how he had been injured, Percy thought with a snort.

" _Stop thinking about that or you will spend a restless night_ " Percy told himself firmly, turning off the lights with a flick of his wand.

OOO

At first, Percy didn't mind the loud noise. His sleep was more and more often taunted by the screams of his family coming from some Azkaban cell.

Only this wasn't a voice but a high-pitched whistle. After an instant, Percy recognized it and stood up with a jolt.

It was his Ministry badge.

The whistle meant that there was some kind of emergency and that Minister Fudge needed to see him urgently. It had already whistled two times that year - for the mass breakout in January and for the Dumbledore's Army in April. What could be going on now?

Maybe the Azkaban fugitives had been found. Maybe Dumbledore had been found. Maybe one of his family members had been arrested, he thought with a shiver.

Percy got out of his pajamas and dressed quickly. Less than five minutes later, he was emerging from a fireplace in the Ministry's Atrium.

The Atrium was packed with people and Percy recognized many Aurors. He dearly wanted to ask one of them what was going on but he wasn't sure that he wanted to hear the answer. Then he heard Fudge's voice calling his name behind him. He turned and gasped.

An unlikely trio was approaching. In the middle walked Cornelius Fudge, awfully pale, wild-eyed, his hands fidgeting nervously with his bowler. On his left side was Rufus Scrimgeour, Head of the Aurors, with his confident, limping swagger and a hard, unreadable expression. And then, on Fudge's right side, Albus Dumbledore, deadly serious.  
Percy was confused. Dumbledore didn't look like one who had just been caught, Fudge didn't look triumphant. What was going on?

"Come to my office with us, Weasley" Fudge said in a high-pitched, quivering voice "I need you to take notes and then I'll have to give a statement to the press"

_What was going on?_

"What happened, Sir?" asked Percy while they approached the elevator.

Giving the impression that he was summoning all of his strength, Fudge answered feebly: "You-Know-Who broke into the Department of Mysteries tonight"

Percy gaped.

"S-sir...?" he spluttered after a moment, not sure that he had understood correctly.

They got into the elevator and they were already passing by level five when Fudge managed to speak again.

"You-Know-Who is back. I saw him with these eyes" he whispered so weakly that Percy had trouble hearing him.

It couldn't be. It _couldn't_. They had spent a year declaring that it was a lie. It was absurd. It was _impossible_. One did _not_ simply come back from the dead. But Fudge looked so upset that Percy didn't dare to ask other questions.

They had reached level one and soon they were sitting in the Minister's office.

Could that really be? Had Dumbledore, Harry Potter and his father been right all along?

"Please fetch some brandy, Weasley" said Fudge, who had found his voice again. But his hand was shaking so much that he spattered some brandy on his cloak while trying to drink.

He managed to take a sip of brandy and then turned to Dumbledore, looking resolute.

"Very well, Dumbledore. I am listening. Weasley, take notes"

And Dumbledore spoke.

He explained that He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named didn't die when he tried to murder Harry Potter and that he transferred some of his abilities - like speaking Parseltongue- to the kid. He explained how Peter Pettigrew -and not Sirius Black- had betrayed the Potters and reunited with his old master, how Peter Pettigrew had disguised himself as a mouse - _Percy's mouse_ \- and was then recognized by Black on a picture in the Daily Prophet. He explained how Barty Crouch Jr. had disguised himself as Alastor Moody in order to bring Harry Potter to He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named, how the dark wizard had used Harry Potter's blood to obtain a new body, how Harry Potter had escaped death because his wand and He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named's one shared the same nucleus. He explained that He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named was looking for a prophecy that concerned him and Potter and was hidden in the Department of Mysteries, which was the reason why Sturgis Podmore and others had been constantly standing guard. He explained how Potter and his friends had been lured to the Department of Mysteries by Lucius Malfoy and other Death Eaters - including the fugitives. He explained how the Order of the Phoenix had been alerted and had intervened, resulting in Sirius Black's death. The other students and Order's members who had been there were unharmed, he added, and Percy was certain that his old Headmaster was speaking to him.

"I trust, Cornelius, that you are going to believe me readily this time, instead of wasting another year" Dumbledore concluded.

Percy had trouble keeping his mind from wandering and his hand from shaking.

So that was it.

Dumbledore, his former teachers, Harry Potter, his family had been right.

Fudge had been wrong. Percy had been wrong.

And He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named was back.

Half an hour later, when Dumbledore was finished, Percy didn't think that he would find the strength to stand up again.

"Before this conversation I asked something of you, Cornelius" Dumbledore said firmly "Please do as I asked".

Fudge turned to Percy and spoke, his voice still very feeble.

"Weasley, write a decree with the following content: educational decrees from number 22 on are abolished and Professor Dumbledore is reinstated as Headmaster with immediate effect. Write a note to Madam Umbridge informing her that her assignment at Hogwarts is over and she should return to the Ministry. Also write a note to the Auror Department stating that both Dumbledore and Hagrid are cleared. Scrimgeour here knows it already but... better to have everything written down. When you're done bring me the papers for signature. Oh, and contact the Daily Prophet and tell them that I am going to make a statement in an hour"

Dumbledore nodded and left with a rather harsh "good night, gentlemen",

Percy walked to his office next to the Minister's one and dropped in his chair, grabbing his head.


	2. The Devil is in the Details

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Percy bumps into Albus Dumbledore and starts questioning his choices after the Department of Mysteries fiasco (in his big-headed way for now, but give him time)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The title is inspired by the song "The Devil is in the Details" by the Chemical Brothers.

**19th and 20th June 1996**

Percy tried very hard not to think while he did what the Minister had requested of him.

He tried very hard not to think while he informed his assistant, Albert Stebbins, about the night's events a few hours later and while he opened the angry letters and Howlers that had started arriving. He would think later, when he was alone.

He worked tirelessly, knowing that it was the only way to cast the thoughts away.

It was very late when Percy finally left the Ministry and stepped out of the fireplace in his flat.

The tiredness and the hunger made him feel slightly dizzy and he started making supper, finally allowing the thoughts to flood his mind.

So his family had been right about He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named's return, although they had believed Harry Potter and Dumbledore based on trust and not on facts. Still there was no point in denying that they had been right all along.

Lucius Malfoy, who had been a regular guest in Fudge's office, was now in Azkaban. At the Ministry there were maybe other people secretly siding with the Death Eaters. Harry

Potter's claim that someone had sent Dementors after him was probably true.

Dumbledore had just tried to warn the wizarding world against the rising challenge and hadn't been plotting against the Minister. In view of this fact, the Ministry's interferences at Hogwarts had been unjustified, although certainly well-meaning.

But that didn't mean that his family and Dumbledore had been right about everything, Percy thought while swallowing his soup.

His father had said that Fudge wanted to spy on their family and on Dumbledore. But Percy hadn't been sacked after he had left the family: on the contrary, both the Minister and the Senior Undersecretary had always been delightful with him. Even if he couldn't provide any information about Dumbledore and the Order. No, Percy had gained and kept his position as a Junior Assistant because he was dependable and hard-working, point. Besides, Percy hadn't told the Minister that his family wanted to join the Order of the Phoenix. So his father's accusations were still uncalled for and offensive.

He still felt furious whenever he thought about that row.

Until that row, he had been a _model son_. He never got into trouble, he got top grades, a good job and a promising career, his behaviour at school had been exemplary, his parents hadn't received a single letter of complaint from his teachers, he could not even remember the last time his father had reprimanded him. His mother kept telling his younger siblings to take a cue from him. When he faced an enquiry because of Mr. Crouch, his first concern was that he might disappoint his parents. And all of this for what? His father had yelled at him like he had never yelled before, not even at the twins. He had dismissed Percy' achievements after he had worked so hard to please his parents. And none of his siblings -nor his mother- stood by him.

Percy stood up, slamming the spoon on the kitchen table and feeling a flush heat his face. After almost a year, the memory of that row made him go berserk.

Well, his family's attitude towards him had been changing even before that row, he had noticed soon after the Quidditch World Cup. In one hour's time, Hermione Granger had snapped at him about a house elf, his mother had harshly reprimanded him for criticizing his father and Bill, his oldest brother, had begged him to shut his mouth. But the confirmation arrived during the second challenge of the Triwizard Tournament, when Ron had been tied up in the lake. Percy had been so worried for Ron that he lost his composure and walked into the lake to help his brother. And Ron had told Percy to get off him and shoved him away.

There had been a time when it was different. Of course, he came from a family of nine people with different and often clashing personalities. There were disagreements and arguments, even loud ones -especially when his mother was involved- but they were fond of each other. With a lump in his throat, Percy remembered that Christmas Day on his fifth year, when Fred and George had forbidden him to sit with the other prefects for lunch because one ought to spend Christmas with family.

Then something had broken, he couldn't say when or why.

But until that row, Percy had believed that _at least his parents_ were on his side.

And then, in half an hour, he had become the bad son. Worse than the twins, who had left Hogwarts without their N.E.W.T.s after having gotten into trouble day in and day out for seven years. Worse than Ron, who had stolen and destroyed the family car, making their father risk his job. But _of course_ , accepting a job offer made by the Minister for Magic in person was much, _much_ worse!

Maybe they reckoned that he would crawl back to ask for forgiveness now that the truth about He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named had emerged, he thought with a scoff. Well, they were free to keep kidding themselves if they wanted to.

OOO

Percy knew that it was just a matter of time before Fudge resigned. The amount of owls, Howlers and statements to the press criticizing the Minister was even larger than the day before and Percy and his assistant could barely keep up with them. He remembered those few days after the Death Eaters' attack and the Quidditch World Cup, when they received so many Howlers that his desk almost caught fire.

Fudge was like a shell of himself. Maybe it was guilt, maybe the prospect of losing his role as Minister, probably both.

Early in the afternoon, Fudge appeared in front of him looking quite self-conscious.

"I have an appointment with Dumbledore tonight. 7:30 PM in my office"

Percy blushed slightly, feeling very uncomfortable at the thought of meeting the Headmaster again. But Fudge added: "It will be only the two of us, you needn't be there".

Understandably, he didn't want his Junior Assistant to witness his humiliation, Percy thought.

He tried his very best to be done with the enormous amount of paperwork before Dumbledore arrived. A quarter of an hour before the meeting, he stood in the lift heading to the Atrium, determined to be out of there as soon as possible.

The elevator door opened and Percy walked out... and almost bumped into Albus Dumbledore, who was stepping into it. He was so surprised that he couldn't collect himself and instinctively hanged his head while standing aside. With great effort, he looked up.

"Ah! Good evening, Percy" said Dumbledore kindly, smiling and regarding him with the benevolent gaze that Percy knew so well.

"Good evening, professor Dumbledore" he replied, trying to keep his voice steady.

More upset that he wanted to admit, he walked over to one of the fireplaces. A few seconds later, he was standing in his neat-looking living room.

OOO

While chopping vegetables with his wand, Percy tried to wipe the Headmaster's face off his mind, although he knew that it was useless.

Percy had never been able to let things slide and to stop dwelling on thoughts that disturbed him.

Suddenly, he recalled his last visit at Hogwarts in April and felt a burst of shame that he wasn't able to control. Chopped vegetables forgotten, he started pacing in his kitchenette.

Well, he was in Fudge's entourage, of course he had been there, just as Shacklebolt and Dawlish, there was no need to…

" _Oh, come off it!_ " said a loud voice inside his head " _you didn't just belong to Fudge's entourage. You were happy to be there!_ "

It was useless to deny it. Percy had felt proud that the Minister would bring him along on such an important occasion. He had been eager to write down Dumbledore's confession, which, he realized now, had maybe been a way to cover up for his pupils. He had been happy to announce to the Daily Prophet that the Headmaster was now a wanted fugitive. He had been gloating.

Why did Dumbledore have to greet him, calling him by his first name and smiling, as if Percy were still a student and they had just met in a school corridor? Percy felt that, if the Headmaster had just walked past him without a word, the remorse would be less painful.

Still, Dumbledore's attitude towards the Minister had been _mutinous_. The Order of the Phoenix was a secret society which took the law into its own hands, bypassing the Minister and the Aurors.

_And yet._

What would have happened to Harry Potter without the Order and without Dumbledore's intervention?

Well, he would have been expelled and deprived of his wand. With He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named and his Death Eaters loose in the country.

The boy would likely be dead by now, there was no pretending otherwise. Percy had never wanted such a thing to happen, nor had Fudge. But, if Dumbledore had left that to the Minister, it would've happened. Point.

Dumbledore had sacrificed his many and prestigious commissions, his excellent reputation, his status, his personal safety in order to warn the wizarding world. Yes, it had been questionable and daring but it was He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named they were talking about.

Percy sighed deeply. Somehow it was easier to reflect about the whole matter as long as he didn't think about his family.

Well. The Dumbledore's Army was a secret group of students who probably learned combat techniques! It was irrelevant whether the Headmaster had founded it himself or had just covered the pupils' liabilities. _That_ was something he could hold against Dumbledore.

The more he thought about it, however, the less he understood. Had Dumbledore really been training Hogwarts students? Or was this Army just a group of students, likely lead by Harry Potter, who had tried to undermine Umbridge's authority? Were they an army or just kids meeting in secret and pulling pranks on the headmistress?

Again, Percy recalled the Death Eaters' attack after the Quidditch World Cup. He remembered those hooded figures, his own fear but also his certainty that he was doing the right thing, helping the Ministry against the dark wizards. Thankfully, on his last year at Hogwarts he'd had a good Defense Against the Dark Arts' teacher, for once. It turned out that he was a werewolf ( _only Dumbledore could hire a werewolf in a school_ ) but he had been a good teacher, that's why Percy had been able to defend himself back then. Could he blame those kids because, terrified by the return of He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named, they had tried to learn something more on their own? Yes, they had behaved as if the Ministry were purposefully endangering them, which wasn't true. But again, it was hard to be reasonable when He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named was around.

Quite unusually, Percy Weasley didn't know what to think.


	3. The Boy in the Bubble

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Percy keeps working as a Junior Assistant to the new Minister Rufus Scrimgeour and finds out that his father had been promoted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The title is inspired by Paul Simon's song "Boy in the Bubble"

**28th June 1996 - 8th July 1996**

Well, he _had_ told himself that it was just a matter of time, Percy thought that evening, lying in his bed.

That morning, Fudge had called Percy in his office, where he found the Head of Auror Department, Rufus Scrimgeour.

"Weasley, inform the press that I am going to give a statement in thirty minutes" said Fudge tersely "Object: my resignation and the appointment of Rufus Scrimgeour as the new Minister for Magic"

Understandable, thought Percy. A man of action, an experienced Auror who had fought in person against Dark Wizards was the logical choice in such dangerous times. And there was no way that Fudge could keep his post after the fiasco at the Department of Mysteries.

Percy didn't attend the handover in front of the press. He kept doing his paperwork, waiting for the moment when he would likely be fired. Why would Scrimgeour want to keep Fudge's Junior Assistant? He hoped dearly that he was at least going to keep some kind of job at the Ministry. He had wanted to work at the Ministry since his childhood: he was ready to begin anew from a less important position but what would happen if he got fired? All his efforts would have been in vain!

Well, in any case he was a hardworking young man with top marks, he would still find something and maybe, with time...

A brisk knock startled him and he raised his head: Rufus Scrimgeour stood in the doorway.

"Come to my office, Weasley" he said bluntly.

Percy did as requested, with a lump in his throat. Scrimgeour had just taken possession of the office but his personality was already stamped on it. The writing desk where Fudge's trinkets and large teapot had been leaning was now empty except for a large number of parchment rolls and a to-do list, part of which had already been checked.

"We need to go over my schedule. There will be a briefing with the Auror Office every day at the same hour and a briefing with the Heads of the Departments twice a week at the same hour. Find a time that works for everybody. Also I have a meeting with Dumbledore at 6 p.m., make sure that we are not disturbed unless You-Know-Who is attacking again. Then we need to update security measures at the Ministry..."

Percy took notes, concealing a sigh of relief: apparently he wasn't going to be fired. Not yet, at least.

Scrimgeour wanted to get things started as soon as possible and made up his mind very quickly. He made many changes to the Minister's daily routine and it was a quite busy day for Percy. To his great relief, he was spared a second encounter with Dumbledore, who went straight to the Minister's office and spent more than one hour there. Whatever they discussed, the meeting probably didn't go as Scrimgeour had hoped, because afterwards the Minister looked even more stern and thin-lipped than usual.

With a sigh, Percy turned to lie on his other side. He wanted dearly to sleep but his mind reeled with thoughts.

Looming above everything else, there was fear. At first he had been too focused on his own error of judgment to think about it, but now he was starting to realise what the return of He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named really meant. It meant the risk of being killed or tortured for everyone who opposed him - like the Ministry and his own family, thought Percy. His memories of the first war were blurred, after all he was only five when it ended. He remembered vaguely the faces of Uncle Fabian and Uncle Gideon, the two maternal uncles who had been murdered by the Death Eaters. The chances of something terrible happening to his family were high, since they were in the Order of the Phoenix and close to Harry Potter.

The very thought made his blood run cold. Besides, as the Junior Assistant to the Minister, he wasn't much safer either.

Except for that letter to Ron, he hadn't spoken or written to any of them for one year - including and especially his father, whom he sometimes spotted at the Ministry. What if one of them died before he reconciled? What if he died without reconciling? Should he get over it and make peace with his family?

His father's face on that infamous evening appeared in front of his eyes, his father's remarks about his blind ambition, his immaturity and his dismissive attitude were still resonating in his head. He remembered Bill, slightly nodding at their father's words with a somber expression on his face. He recalled his younger siblings' scandalized look when he had declared his loyalty to the Ministry. And his mother, who had tried to cool the two of them down, without siding with him.

_There was no way he could get over it._

Fine. He would leave a note for his family and deposit it at Gringotts in case something happened to him. That would do.

Moreover, the Ministry's new attitude against He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named would certainly work. The Death Eaters now had Aurors looking after them, the new Minister knew how to fight Dark Wizards. Maybe there wasn't going to be another war after all.

OOO

This was going to be another troubled night, Percy thought a few days later, rolling over in his bed for the umpteenth time. His heart was beating fast and he was annoyed to no end.

The contrast between Fudge's and Scrimgeour's personalities became more striking with every new day. Fudge had been emotional, easy-going and jovial, Scrimgeour was tough, blunt and cold. There was something of a feline about him, apparently calm but ready to attack at any moment. He also made it very clear that he was ready to use people for the greater good without any hesitation, if necessary.

"Weasley, Fudge tells me your family is close with Harry Potter" Scrimgeour had stated without preamble in the morning, when Percy brought him his updated schedule.

"Yes, sir. He uses to spend a part of the summer with my family" Percy answered cautiously.

"So you know him well" Scrimgeour didn't ask question, he made statements.

"Not really, sir. He is best friends with my brother Ronald but he's never had a close relationship with me"

"Still, the two of you had some kind of interaction!" replied the Minister impatiently.

"Yes, sir, plenty of interaction" Percy answered, unsure of where this was going.

"What can you tell me about the boy? What is he like?"

Percy wondered whether he really knew what Harry Potter was like, since he had spent an year believing that the boy was mental. He tried to answer the question as objectively as possible.

"He is kind-natured and selfless. He is also hot-tempered and sometimes reckless. He is bold but also extremely sensitive to things… which don't bother other people as much as they bother him… like Dementors" he clarified at the end, noticing that Scrimgeour gazed quizzically at him.

"You say selfless…" Scrimgeour repeated, seemingly lost in his own thoughts.

"Here's the thing, Weasley" the Minister said after a moment, looking determined "Fudge's attitude towards the boy after the Triwizard Tournament was ill-advised and the public opinion is unhappy with the Ministry"

Percy stayed silent, starting to see what the Minister's intention was.

"If we want the public to trust us again, it is essential that we re-establish a good relationship with Potter. Voices that he is the only one who can defeat You-Know-Who are becoming insistent and, whether they are true or not, his approval would be an enormous morale booster. I asked Dumbledore to organize an encounter with the boy but he answered with a resounding no!" Scrimgeour stood, his irritation barely concealed.

"I will not allow Dumbledore to take charge of the situation. So if I cannot meet Potter with Dumbledore's help, I will meet him without his help. And that's where you come in"

"Sir, regrettably I don't have any contact with my family anymore. As a consequence, I have no contact with Potter either"  
Scrimgeour looked clearly disappointed but he didn't push.

"Well. I will find a way" he answered tersely.

Percy snorted. Was that the reason why he hadn't been fired yet? Because the Minister wanted to use him?

But _no_. Scrimgeour's attitude towards him hadn't changed after that conversation. The Minister looked very satisfied with Percy, although he wasn't as inclined to pay compliments as Fudge had been. No, Scrimgeour had kept him as his Junior Assistant because he was capable. Percy should _not_ let his father's insults bother him.

_Speaking of his father._

Just a few hours after his conversation with the Minister about Harry Potter, his father had been promoted for the first time in almost fifteen years and had accepted the promotion.  
Scrimgeour hadn't wasted any time, thought Percy with a sneer. He wanted Potter on his side and, since Percy couldn't help him with that, he was now trying with his father. And Mr. _"Your ambition is blinding you"_ had accepted the promotion without minding its odd timing.

Percy didn't blame him for accepting it. His father was a competent and dedicated officer, he could have been promoted centuries before if he'd had the slightest bit of ambition. Besides, he was not going to sell Harry Potter to the Ministry just because he had been promoted. But why was it OK for his father to accept a questionable promotion and it wasn't OK for Percy to do the same?

Percy decided that he didn't care for the answer.


	4. I was a Boy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Percy gets a new secretary who doesn't look very fond of him and muses on his love life (or lack of one)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The title is inspired by the song "I was a boy" by El Perro del Mar (both because of the lyrics and because my own version of Audrey looks a little like the singer).
> 
> In this chapter, I portray Percy as essentially inexperienced although he had a girlfriend at Hogwarts. I know that it's a questionable choice and that many fanfic writers have a different opinion. I personally cannot imagine Percy having sex with Penelope Clearwater in a toilet or a classroom at Hogwarts, not because he wouldn't desire to but because he wouldn't take the risk of being discovered or of breaking rules. He also doesn't strike me as a hormone-driven teenager (well, he doesn't look like a teenager in many ways). Given how he is portrayed in the books, I think he would be quite awkward and uptight. A delayed first experience fits rather well with the character, in my opinion.

**August 1996 - November 1996**

Well, his new secretary was certainly an improvement compared with Stebbins, Percy mused while making an omelette with mushrooms.

 _That was a bit unfair_ , wasn't it? Stebbins hadn't been so bad, after all. Sometimes he was absent-minded and forgetful but he had worked very hard to fill the gaps. And now that Percy was quite satisfied with him, Stebbins had to go.

Of course, the position of secretary to the Junior Assistant was an internship intended for recent Hogwarts graduates, who weren't supposed to stay more than one year.  
Percy enjoyed training young interns but this was hardly the time for it. He had enough to deal with at the moment, without having to train a new secretary in addition.

So, when Calpurnia Bode of Wizarding Resources showed up with a familiar-looking, blonde young lady, he stood up without much enthusiasm.

"Ah, Mr. Weasley. Allow me to introduce your new secretary, Audrey Swinton" she said.

 _Ah, yes_ , Percy told himself. He remembered her from Hogwarts, she had become a Ravenclaw Prefect the same year he was appointed Head Boy.

Miss Swinton nodded in recognition and shook his hand with a polite but half-hearted smile.

At Hogwarts she had been warmer and friendlier, whereas now she was more reserved. This was appropriate since now he was her superior and they weren't schoolmates anymore. However, Percy felt that a desire for appropriateness was not the only reason for her cold attitude. For despite her polite and respectful behaviour it was quite clear that she didn't like him very much.

Percy sighed. She had been in Fred and George's year, they had certainly told everybody at school that he was the family's _black sheep_!

Not that it mattered, anyway. Miss Swinton was his secretary and he didn't need her to like him. He didn't need her approval, on the contrary, she needed his.

And if she kept working like that she would definitely get it, Percy thought, impressed. She was bright, a quick study, efficient and proper. And as long as she did her job, it didn't matter whether she liked him or not.

OOO

He couldn't ask for a better secretary, Percy told himself several times during the following weeks.

Miss Swinton's reports needed almost no correction and her way of organizing files was almost more efficient than Percy's one.

"Where do you intend to work after your internship, Miss Swinton?" he asked her one day. She certainly had the attitude for Magical Law Enforcement.

"I would like to work in Experimental Charms" she said promptly.

He raised an eyebrow, surprised.

"That is quite an unusual choice" he commented, unsure of what to say. Not that he disapproved of Experimental Charms but this was not the answer he had expected.

"Charms have always been my favourite subject at Hogwarts. Professor Flitwick always encouraged us to experiment and it occurred to me that I could do that as a job. I find it so _fascinating_!" she was so excited about Charms that she actually smiled at him for the first time.

Since Fudge's resignation, the only person who smiled to Percy was Dolores Umbridge, who had resumed her position as Senior Undersecretary for Scrimgeour. It was very _gracious_ of her but Dolores reminded him too much of his embarrassment with Dumbledore, so her smiles didn't exactly improve his mood.

He felt the need to smile back at Miss Swinton and to answer heartily: "Well, the Ravenclaw house is famous for its inventors and experimenters. Work as well as you do here and you'll do an outstanding job"

She looked taken aback for a moment, then she said "Thank you" with another quiet smile.

Percy noticed that Miss Swinton had become slightly friendlier with him after that episode - which was more than he could say about her attitude with Umbridge.

Upon hearing that Umbridge was still working at the Ministry, Miss Swinton had taken an expression that could have turned water into ice. For a moment, he wanted to inquire about Umbridge's behaviour at school but her look told him that this was hardly the time to do so.

She had likely read the Daily Prophet's article where he praised Umbridge's work at Hogwarts calling it a _success_ and _exciting news_. Percy didn't know the details of Umbridge's method of working but he knew that _success_ was not the right word to define that experience at Hogwarts.

"Her position at Hogwarts hasn't been renewed" he said eventually, in a tentative voice.

He half-expected Miss Swinton to reply something like _I should hope so_ or _you bet it hasn't_ like her expression implied but she didn't. She haughtily raised both eyebrows and went back to her paperwork.

Percy realised that she probably didn't trust him enough to voice her opinion.

OOO

On November 1st, Miss Swinton showed up to work with a glum look and weary eyes. At first, Percy thought that maybe she had kept early hours because of Hallowe'en but she didn't strike him as the type who would party until dawn.

She worked with the usual efficiency but kept very quiet. Percy wondered whether he should address the matter and eventually decided to do so. Maybe she was ill and wished to go home a couple of hours earlier.

"Are you feeling alright, Miss Swinton? You may go home if you are unwell"

She looked up at him and, with Percy's surprise, smiled feebly.

"I am not unwell. It's just that my boyfriend and I broke up yesterday. But it will not affect my work" she said softly.

"I am very sorry" he answered cautiously "were you together a long time?" He didn't know why he was asking that but it sounded rude to drop the subject without asking anything.

"Two years. We were living together and some of his belongings are still in my flat. It will get better after he collects them" her voice was slightly unsteady and he looked down at his desk, not wanting to embarrass her.

"I am really, really sorry" he repeated.

"That's life" she said tersely, her voice steady again "Thank you for asking"

Percy took a moment to reflect about his love life - or rather lack of one.

Back at Hogwarts, it had looked so simple. He and Penelope had been dating for more than two years, without big fights, without time-outs. He was going to wait until both of them had secured their respective careers (Penny wanted to become a Healer) and one year after graduation he would propose to her. In the meanwhile, he would introduce her officially to his family, maybe on his birthday in August.

But then, on the very last school day, Penny had dumped him.

Percy remembered very well that conversation. She explained that she had come to that decision a couple of months before but, knowing how much he cared about his N.E.W.T.s, she had waited until the end of the exams to break up with him. He had been speechless for quite a while, it was the last thing he was expecting on his very last school day. Then he had managed to ask why. She had answered in a kind voice but her words hurt nonetheless.

_You keep bragging about the fact that you are Head Boy, that you obtained an internship at the Ministry of Magic, that you have top marks and so on. I hoped it would improve with time but... I am really sorry that I have to say it, Percy... you are becoming more and more self-righteous and sometimes it is difficult to stand it._

He had always assumed that she was proud of his accomplishments while she actually considered him self-righteous! Well, that hadn't been the only blow anyway.

_You are kind, polite and respectful and when we started dating I believed that it was enough. You were different from the other fifteen years-old boys who just wanted to snog. But now… I cannot imagine a future and a family with you just because you are a nice guy._

She said many other things. She found polite words and articulate sentences to call him _childish_ , _arrogant_ , _dismissive_ , _pompous_ and other things, some of which Percy had already heard from his siblings. Oh, yes, she kept repeating " _I am sorry that I have to say this_ " and " _I don't mean to hurt you_ " but she said those things and they hurt.

The last of her reprimands was also the most unexpected one.

_When we kiss, it feels like you don't want more. We kiss like we did when we were fifteen, and every time I try to make it more intimate you are reluctant._

This had left Percy speechless. Whereas physical intimacy itself was not forbidden at Hogwarts, the curfew, the communal life and the houses' separation made it impossible to do more than snogging. They had already been caught kissing in a classroom during their sixth years, he certainly didn't want them to be caught half naked or _worse_! He had always assumed that they would take the following step after graduating, as soon as one of them would have a place of their own.

He had tried to explain this to Penny but she had just shaken her head.

_It's not just that. You could kiss me more passionately but you don't. You could hold me a little tighter but you don't! I feel like... like I am snogging a statue!_

It had never occurred to him that Penelope might want passion. She knew that he wasn't quite the emotional type, why did she expect that of him?

After dissecting each and every one of his flaws, Penny stood and thanked him. She said that he was _gentle_ and _supportive_ and _serious_ and many other nice things, none of which was enough to make their relationship work.

Percy observed an appropriate period of mourning and then tried to move on. He dated Judith, a girl who worked for the Accidental Magic Reversal Squad, but when he inquired about a second date she answered politely that she wasn't interested. Percy admitted that he had probably talked too much about his job and Mr. Crouch: he thought that she would be interested and impressed since she worked for the Ministry too, but he had been wrong.

Then there were the Crouch fiasco, his promotion, the row with his family, his job as Fudge's assistant which didn't leave much time for social life. At first, Percy was convinced that his advancement would make him a good catch - after all, he had a very good position and perspectives at such a young age!

Well, another wrong assumption, he thought with a shrug. He had never been very popular among his peers and his pro-Fudge stance hadn't helped. The closest thing he had to a friend at Hogwarts, Oliver Wood, abruptly stopped writing to him after the attempt to arrest Dumbledore. Many ministry employees whom he knew from Hogwarts didn't speak to him anymore. Not to mention Miss Swinton's initial attitude towards him.

Of course, he was still young and there was plenty of time to settle down. But was there a girl who would see him as something more than a _humongous bighead,_ as his brothers would say?


	5. Stuck in a Moment You Can't Get Out Of

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Percy reluctantly accompanies Scrimgeour to the Burrow on Christmas Day and finds this experience very unsettling.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter contains quotes from "Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince"
> 
> The title is inspired by the song "stuck in a moment you can't get out of" by U2

**25th -26th December 1996**

Percy sat on his armchair, a forgotten cup of tea resting on the coffee table in front of him.

The previous Christmas hadn't been that great but this one had been just _awful_.

"Harry Potter is spending the Christmas Holidays at your parents' house, Weasley" told him Scrimgeour on December 23, without preamble as usual.

"Curious. He usually stays at Hogwarts" answered Percy, not knowing what else to say. He had a feeling that he knew what the Ministry wanted from him.

"I must speak with the boy, Weasley. There is no chance while he's at Hogwarts - Dumbledore is blind to reason. We must take advantage of the holidays"

 _There we go_ , thought Percy.

He understood, of course. The Minister wanted to meet Potter and tried to do it by any means. There was a war going on. This wasn't personal.

"We will visit your family on Christmas Day and I will speak with that boy, Dumbledore or not, my word it is!"

Percy wanted to say that it wasn't possible. That Harry Potter would be less likely to reveal anything to the Minister if he came with Percy, of all people. But Scrimgeour's expression was so adamant that he didn't dare to argue.

And so, a few hours before, Percy showed up at the Burrow with the Minister for Magic.

_He had to pull himself together. This was work, just work._

They were all there - his parents, his siblings, Harry Potter and... Percy recognised Fleur Delacour, the Beauxbatons champion of the Triwizard Tournament, sitting next to Bill. Oh. _Was he going to have a sister-in-law any soon?_

He had barely the time to step into the kitchen and to wish his mother a merry Christmas before she rushed to him, hugging him tightly.

 _What was he supposed to do?_ He _couldn't_ push her away. He could push away his father, but his mother… He couldn't hold her tightly either. This was work. And the matter with his family was not settled yet. She hadn't taken his side while his father called him a _dismissive know-it-all_ and _blinded by his ambition_. And now she behaved as nothing had happened? Ha!

He accepted the embrace without hugging her back.

And then the Minister spoke.

_"You must forgive this intrusion. Percy and I were in the vicinity -working, you know- and he couldn't resist dropping in and seeing you all"_

Percy's heart skipped a beat. He had assumed that the Minister was going to be straightforward, not that he was going to find such a lame excuse!

_"Well, if anybody cared to show me your charming garden…. that young man's finished, why doesn't he take a stroll with me?"_

Why couldn't he just say _"Mr. Potter, I would like to speak to you"_? thought Percy, leaning back on the armchair. Why couldn't just say that he had asked Percy to accompany him because showing up alone at someone else's Christmas luncheon would be rude? Why did he say that they were there at Percy's request?

Did Scrimgeour think that his excuse could fool anyone? Or, more likely, he didn't care about what Percy's family was going to think?

But their eyes, which had been surprised at the sight of Percy, turned cold. Well, apart from his father, who hadn't even looked at him and seemed to find the decoration on his plate extremely interesting. But his siblings looked at him with something which was very similar to hatred.

Of course, they all thought that Percy was in on it. Maybe even that _he_ had suggested this strategy to Scrimgeour in the first place. He was the _black sheep_ , after all! None of them would believe that Percy wanted so badly to see them, who could believe such a ridiculous pretence?

Harry followed the Minister in the garden and Percy was left alone with his family.

Percy felt like an _object_ , like a tool. For a moment, he wanted to shout _"I didn't know that he was going to say that!"_ but it would be meaningless. He would have never imagined that Fred and George's faces could express such anger or that Ginny would one day look at him with such plain loathing.

Except for his mother, nobody had spoken to him and clearly nobody wanted to. But she didn't give up and kept trying to make conversation.

"How is work going, dear?"

"Fine"

"Did you hear that Horace Slughorn is back at Hogwarts?"

"Yes"

"Do you know Fleur, Bill's fiancée?"

Bill turned hastily to their mother, slightly annoyed. He didn't want his fiancée to be involved.

"Yes" replied Percy tersely.

He heard a whisper coming from where the twins and Ginny sat. He turned to them...

…and a handful of mashed parsnip hit him on the face, followed almost immediately by a second one that hit his immaculate shirt and tie.

"Who did that?!" yelled his mother "Percy is visiting and we should try to…"

Percy took a step back and she immediately turned to him.

"Go clean yourself up, dear, and I am sure someone can lend you a jumper..." she said hopfeully, with a quivering voice.

He was covered in parsnip that kept dropping from his glasses and his chin. In a few moments, his boss would return and find him in like this.

Percy had _never_ felt so ashamed in his entire life. Not even in front of a Ministry committe asking how he could not have noticed that Mr. Crouch had gone mad.

He felt his face flushing and his eyes burning.

 _Oh, no_. He _wasn't_ going to cry in front of them, they could be sure about that!

"There's no need" he said icily "Good bye, Mother"

"Percy, I am sure that…"

He didn't let her finish the sentence and stormed from the house, hoping that she wasn't going to follow him. She didn't.

Taking very deep breaths, he hastily cleaned his glasses, face and clothes. A large purple stain of parsnip remained on his shirt and he tried to cover it with the cloak.

A couple of minutes later, Scrimgeour joined him. He looked more enraged than Percy had ever seen him and limped away, muttering under his breath.

"It's like talking to a wall!" he hissed "He said that helping the Ministry would imply that he agrees with what I do, while he doesn't agree! Can you believe his nerve? That _spoiled_ _brat_! Dumbledore's done a good job with the boy… he admitted to me that he is _Dumbledore's man through and through_!"

He shook his head, huffing.

"Go home, Weasley" said Scrimgeour bluntly, turning to him "I will see you tomorrow"

Back in his small apartment, Percy had spent twenty minutes sitting at the kitchen table trying not to cry.

_This is just work._

_This is not personal._

_There is no need to be emotional._

It worked, somehow, and after a while Percy sat on his armchair with a cup of his favourite black tea.

What a _horrible_ Christmas. His memory went back to the previous Christmas Days. That one during his fifth year, when Fred and George forced him to eat with them. Fred and George who now looked as if they wanted to curse him.

He felt _awful_.

OOO

On the following day, Miss Swinton showed up to work with a light blue pullover Percy had never seen on her and a cheerful smile.

 _I just hope she doesn't start asking how my Christmas was_ , Percy muttered to himself.

But she didn't, neither did she speak about her own Christmas. Of course, she knew about his disagreements with his family and probably assumed that he had spent Christmas alone.

_Actually he wished he had..._

A couple of times, he noticed that she was looking intently at him. Did he look as awful as he felt or was she just pitying him for his lonely Christmas?

_Well, it didn't make any sense to dwell about that, did it?_

The office door opened and the Minister limped in.

"You'll need to update my schedule, Weasley. I have a meeting with the head of Magical Law Enforcement at 3 p.m."

While Percy complied, the Minister turned to Miss Swinton.

"Had a nice Christmas, Swinton?"

"Yes, Sir. With my family in Nottingham. And you, Sir?"

"Working. All in a day's work…" he said briskly.

Percy handed the updated schedule back to the Minister, trying not to meet his eyes.

Oh, he wasn't _angry_ at the man. He understood, it was for the greater good. And if Dumbledore had allowed Scrimgeour to meet Harry Potter at Hogwarts it wouldn't have been necessary to go the Burrow. No, he wasn't angry.

He felt like a _pawn_. A small chess piece who was kept until it was useful and could be sacrificed at any time to gain something more useful.

To Scrimgeour, he was just a pawn. Had he been just a pawn for Fudge too?

He didn't find the energy to remind himself that he shouldn't listen to his father's insults.

After lunch, Miss Swinton came back with two large Chocoballs with clotted cream and put one of them on his table.

Percy looked up at her.

"I wanted something to eat my tea and one doesn't eat a dessert without offering" she explained with a smile.

Was it just a coincidence or was she trying to cheer him up?

"Thank you, Miss Swinton. It is very thoughtful of you" he answered politely.

Well, maybe it had just been a polite gesture but he felt touched nonetheless.

There was someone who didn't shot him hateful glares and didn't give him the silent treatment and didn't exploit him (and who wasn't his own mother).

He ate his Chocoball slowly, feeling slightly less awful.


	6. Nowhere Warm

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Percy attends Dumbledore's funeral and he is confronted with Bill's injuries and with his secretary's disdain.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The chapter's title is inspired by the song "Nowhere Warm" by Kate Havnevik

**July 1st 1997 - July 4th 1997**

_Who was whistling so loudly?_ thought Percy stirring in his bed.

 _Oh_. His Ministry badge was whistling. _Again_.

He stood swiftly, silenced the badge with his wand and quickly changed into a grey robe.

Last time the badge had whistled, He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named had broken into the Department of Mysteries with the Death Eaters. What could've had happened this time?

 _Well, certainly nothing good,_ Percy told himself with a snort.

In a few minutes he stepped out of a fireplace in the Ministry's Atrium. He immediately caught sight of Rufus Scrimgeour standing at short distance with the Aurors Shacklebolt and Dawlish and Pius Thicknesse, Head of the Magical Law Enforcement department. Percy hurried to them.

"Good, now we're all here" said the Minister. He was very pale and his expression was the closest thing to shock one could see on Scrimgeour's face.

Before Percy could ask any questions, Scrimgeour spoke.

"We must go to Hogwarts. Dumbledore is dead"

Percy froze.

He wanted to ask when and how and where but he just stood there, opening and closing his mouth.

"Let's Apparate out of the school grounds and I'll explain everything on the way" the Minister said tersely.

Shortly after, the five apparated at the designated point and headed to the castle.

Percy felt an icy sensation in his stomach. Dumbledore _dead_? _Certainly there was a mistake!_

"Tonight, while Dumbledore was away -Merlin knows where-, some Death Eaters broke into the school. No idea how they did that." said Scrimgeour suddenly, startling him.

 _Death Eaters in a school full of kids_ , including Ron and Ginny. What about them? Were they safe? Were they _alive_?

"As soon as the breach was detected, members of the staff and a group of students started fighting the Death Eaters. " the Minister went on.

 _A group of students_. Percy was ready to bet that his younger siblings were among them. Ok, now he felt really sick.

"Shortly after, they were joined by members of the Order of the Phoenix"

 _Members of the Order._ Like his older siblings and his parents. Percy swallowed a couple of times, trying to overcome the nausea.

"There weren't any casualties, luckily. Some people have been injured but they're not in life-threatening conditions"

Percy shuddered with relief.

His family was safe… at least until the next attack by the Death Eaters.

"In the meanwhile, Dumbledore returned, likely on a broomstick because he landed on the Astronomy Tower. He found a group of Death Eaters and was murdered. After killing Dumbledore, the Death Eaters stopped fighting and fled... and Severus Snape ran away with them"

Percy gasped so loudly that the Minister turned to him.

"Yes, Weasley. After so many years one could think that Snape was trustworthy. It seems Dumbledore trusted the wrong people!"

Kingsley Shacklebolt turned his head to the Minister and Percy almost gasped again upon noticing his expression. Shacklebolt looked utterly shocked, his eyes wide and his stare blank. That man was always so calm that his shock terrified Percy more than Dumbledore's death itself.  
Dumbledore's death.

When Percy was born, Dumbledore was already very old. Yet the idea that he might die soon had never occurred to Percy. Dumbledore was everlasting, he was always there, sitting on his throne-like chair in the Great Hall, long white beard and twinkling eyes… _it couldn't be true…_

They had reached the oak doors and found Argus Filch, the Head Boy and Head Girl waiting for them. Percy noticed that the girl had puffy eyes - he also noticed the hateful glare that both students shot at him. Of course, he was the _monster_ who had supported Dolores Umbridge on the press, who had tried to send Dumbledore to Azkaban!

Percy averted his gaze.

"I'll go see Professor McGonagall" said Scrimgeour "and you lot will go to the Astronomy Tower and take a look. Weasley, go with them and write a report"

He was already walking away with the other three men when Scrimgeour called him back.

"Listen, Weasley" the Minister said in an unusually soft voice "Professor Slughorn informed me that your brother William was wounded during the battle. He is in stable condition, nothing life threatening - he is here at the Hospital Wing and apparently doesn't need to be transferred to St. Mungo"

Wounded by _whom? How? Where?_ Percy wanted to ask many question but he found that he could barely move his lips.

"Thank you" he managed to say eventually

OOO

A few hours later, Percy sat in his desk, grabbing his head.

They had inspected the Astronomy Tower and found two broomsticks ( _Bet I know who was on the other one_ , had growled Scrimgeour). They had learned that young Draco Malfoy had left the school together with Snape and the Death Eaters. Unsurprising, since his father belonged to the lot...

Percy hadn't visited Bill in the Hospital Wing.

Well, after all Bill wasn't in a critical condition, otherwise he would've been moved to St. Mungo's. There was no reason to face his family again. Merlin knew what they would say and do to him this time, shocked as they certainly were for Dumbledore's death and Bill's injuries. They wouldn't be happy to see him after his last visit on Christmas. _No, no reason to visit Bill at all._

The door opened and Audrey Swinton rushed into the office, her face white.

"I-I came as soon as I read the newspapers" she stuttered "What happened? How?"

Percy summarised the events of the previous night for her and she listened silently, wiping her eyes. He omitted the fact that his brother had been injured - she didn't need to know that.

Miss Swinton covered her eyes with her hands.

"Snape! He sat next to Dumbledore every day for _all these years_ and now…"

She shook her head disbelievingly.

"How are we supposed to win this war without Dumbledore?" she whispered. "If they can break into Hogwarts… I wouldn't be surprised if they took over the Ministry next"

_A little dramatic, wasn't it?_

"Oh, I wouldn't worry about _that_ " Percy said lightly "the Ministry is not a school"

She removed her hands from her face and looked up at him. Percy expected to see sadness or fear, instead she glared at him with disdainful pity.

"If they can kill Dumbledore like that, do you _really_ believe that the Ministry stands a chance?"

Now, now. Dumbledore had been a great wizard and he had been the first to warn the Wizarding World against He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named's return. Still, there were other brilliant wizards and they were certainly more numerous than the Death Eaters!

" _Of course_ I believe that!" he answered importantly "Besides, fighting Dark Wizards is the Aurors' job, not Dumbledore's!"

He hoped that this answer would reassure her but he was wrong. She didn't even grace him with an answer and started working without another word.

OOO

Percy walked through the school grounds with the rest of Scrimgeour's entourage.

The previous three days had been _awful_.

Since that brief exchange the day after Dumbledore's death, Miss Swinton had been treating him with polite iciness. Not a smile, not a word that wasn't strictly necessary, she went to eat without asking if he wanted to come along. No, she wasn't being disrespectful, but Percy didn't need to hear the insults from her mouth to know that she was insulting him in her head.

Frankly, Percy found her reaction a bit _too much_. Sure, Dumbledore's death was a great loss, especially in this moment. Of course, the fact that Death Eaters could break into Hogwarts raised concerns about security... but it didn't mean that they were doomed! The Ministry wasn't a bunch of idiots, the Aurors knew their job and the Minister had everything under control. They didn't need to _loose their heads._

He searched the crowd with his eyes until he found her. Since Miss Swinton worked for Percy but didn't belong to the Minister's entourage, she had arrived on her own to attend the funeral. She stood among a group of former Ravenclaw students, her face buried in a handkerchief.

It looked like the whole wizarding population of the country was attending the funeral. There were students, teachers, Ministry officers, people Percy had seen in Diagon Alley and Hogsmeade, goblins, centaurs… of course his whole family was there. With a sigh of relief he spotted Bill from behind, busy talking to Fleur Delacour. _Well, it looked like his injury hadn't been serious at all._

Percy politely refused to sit in the first row with the authorities. Professor McGonagall was going to sit there as well and he didn't want her to look at him.

During the service, he couldn't pay attention to the celebrant's words. He recalled the letter that had appointed him Head Boy, signed by Dumbledore himself. That night during his last year when he had watched over the students in the Great Hall while the teachers looked for Sirius Black, how Dumbledore had trusted him with that task. Eventually, his mind wandered back to his last encounter with Dumbledore, in the Ministry's lift. And to that _awful night_ when they had tried to arrest him…

He blushed violently and looked down. It hadn't been his finest moment and he had never apologized...

_Well, he couldn't apologize anymore now, so there was no need to think about that._

After the service, Percy stood and hoped that the Minister would leave at once. But Scrimgeour clearly wanted to talk to Harry Potter again, and Percy was forced to wait with the rest of the entourage.

Looking around, he spotted Seamus Finnigan and Neville Longbottom. As soon as they noticed him, they turned their backs to him with an angry glare. He had been their Prefect...

 _And there was McGonagall._ She looked at him before he could avert his gaze and he felt as if she was punching his face. He had never seen such contempt in her eyes.

Determined not to meet anybody else's eyes, Percy stared ahead of him… and almost staggered.

Bill stood at a short distance, talking with Ron. Bill, with his face completely disfigured, as if a wild animal had bitten him. Percy felt a violent wave of nausea and looked away, closing his eyes.

When he opened them again, Scrimgeour was returning and his brother Ron was walking past them with Hermione Granger, both of them looking pointedly away. Percy noticed that Ron's fists were clenched and that Hermione was clutching his arm... _just as if Ron wanted to hit Percy and she were trying to prevent it..._

"Let's go back" barked the Minister, and Percy was more than happy to oblige.

OOO

In the following days, it appeared clear that Scrimgeour shared some of Miss Swinton's worries about the Ministry's future.

After Dumbledore had been murdered by a member of the staff, he was understandably afraid that the same could happen to him, thought Percy. The Minister even started sleeping in his office, maybe afraid that someone would try to kill him on the way.

"From this moment on, only Dawlish will accompany me when I go out" told him the Minister a few days after Dumbledore's funeral. "I wish to endanger as few people as possible, and Dawlish is an Auror. I also won't be sharing confidential information with the Senior Undersecretary and with you anymore. The fewer people know, the better"

Did Scrimgeour really think that Percy could be a mole? Or he thought that Percy would reveal this information under the Cruciatus Curse? He believed that the Ministry trusted him… _well, probably an Auror like Scrimgeour never really trusted anyone._

The rest of his life was not much better.

Miss Swinton kept treating him with respectful disdain. On the day after the funeral she had been kind, bringing him tea and offering to stay late in order to help him with the paperwork - probably because Percy had spent a sleepless night thinking about Bill and looked _horrible_. But then she had turned into an iceberg again.

It wasn't pleasant. She had been quite nice for months, and now… _well, luckily her assignment was going to end on August 15th, he didn't need to think about that_.

Cherry on top, he received an invitation to Bill's wedding for the upcoming July 31st.

He had spent a whole evening looking at the invitation and trying to decide what to do.

He was surprised that Bill wanted to invite him. They hadn't spoken in years and Percy hadn't even visited him in the Hospital Wing, Bill had every reason not to invite him.

Percy was happy for Bill. He was especially happy that his fiancée still wanted to marry him even if he was disfigured. Clearly, he had chosen well.

But the idea of being at the Burrow again, with his family and their friends… no, he just couldn't bear it. His brothers' hateful stares, Auntie Muriel's questions, Harry and Hermione who would undoubtedly despise him, family friends who knew about the row, Hogwarts students who loathed him...

 _No_. No way he could _ever_ attend.


	7. Yesterday - Part One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After the appointment of Pius Thicknesse as Minister for Magic, Percy questions his loyalty to the Ministry

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The chapter's title is inspired by the song "Yesterday" by The Beatles
> 
> "Yesterday  
> All my troubles seemed so far away,  
> now it looks as though they're here to stay,  
> oh, I believe in yesterday.  
> Suddenly  
> I'm not half the man I used to be,  
> there's a shadow hanging over me..."

**August 2nd 1997**

It was 2 a.m. and Percy was lying in bed on his back, his eyes fixed on the ceiling.

He couldn't sleep. It was _impossible_ to sleep.

The day before, he had arrived to work at the usual time and had checked the Minister's schedule, waiting for Scrimgeour to pick it up at 8 a.m. like every day.

But Scrimgeour didn't show up.

It was the first time since his appointment that the Minister didn't show up at 8 a.m. Furthermore, he practically lived in his office now. He even slept there!  
Percy decided to wait for a short while. Maybe the Minister had a meeting or was speaking to someone in his office and didn't want to be disturbed.

After ten minutes, however, he decided to check and knocked on Scrimgeour's door. It was opened almost immediately and Percy drew a sigh of relief...

… but that wasn't Scrimgeour. It was Pius Thicknesse. Percy could see Dolores Umbridge standing behind him, next to the Minister's desk. But Scrimgeour was nowhere to be seen.

"Ah, Mr. Thicknesse, Madam Umbridge. I am looking for the Minister, he hasn't picked up his schedule yet"

"Ah, Weasley" said Thicknesse wearily "good that you are here, indeed. Unfortunately, Rufus Scrimgeour has resigned"

This was the very last thing Percy was expecting to hear.

"I-I _beg your pardon_?"

"A mental breakdown. Very sad but understandable after this difficult year" explained Thicknesse with the same plain voice.

That _couldn't_ be.

Scrimgeour suffering from a _mental breakdown_?! No way! Besides, Percy had seen him on the previous evening and he didn't look broken at all. He had told Percy " _I'll see you tomorrow_ ". Should he really believe that the Minister had resigned?

"But then wh-who is the Minister now?" asked Percy nervously.

"I" replied Thicknesse, emotionless.

"Ah..." answered Percy, unsure of what to say.

Had the Death Eaters taken over the Ministry? But... but the Ministry looked exactly as it was on any other day, with the same clerks... it didn't look like there had been a battle. He couldn't even consider the idea that He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named had taken the Ministry without even fighting!

"I was just telling the new Minister what a valuable Junior Assistant you are" said Umbridge's mellow voice from behind Thicknesse. Percy had forgotten that she was there. "It would be a pity if you were dismissed just because the previous Minister resigned. Luckily, Minister Thicknesse is more than happy to keep you as his assistant"

How could she be so gleeful? What were they going to say to the press, to the people?

"The Minister wishes to make some important changes, Percy" Umbridge went on, looking more gloating with every word she said. "First of all a re-organizing of the Departments and the appointment of new Heads of Departments. But we will discuss it later, now we have a meeting. There is no need for you to come, I will write the report myself"

During Umbridge's speech, Thicknesse remained silent, standing in the middle of the room, staring blankly ahead.

"Very well" said Percy quietly. It was all very odd. And what did " _reorganizing of Departments_ " mean?

He went back to his office and sat at his desk, unsure of what to do. Miss Swinton, who arrived ten minutes later, found him fidgeting.

"What happened? You look shocked!" she said upon seeing him.

"Scrimgeour resigned" he said tersely.

"WHAT?"

In a few words, Percy told her about his encounter with Thicknesse and Umbridge.

She became paler with every word he said.

"One month" she whispered eventually "They needed only one month to take over the Ministry"

"Well, we have no proof that the Death Eaters took over" he tried to reason "There aren't any signs of a battle"

"Ever heard about the Imperius Curse?!" she asked quite harshly "Do you _really_ believe that Scrimgeour resigned?!"

For the first time since Percy knew her, Miss Swinton looked really angry.

He was about to answer when a purple paper airplane flew inside and landed on Percy's desk. He opened it and read:

_INSTITUTION OF THE MUGGLE-BORN REGISTRATION COMMISSION_   
_Given the recent research undertaken by the Department of Mysteries revealing that magic can only be passed from person to person when wizards reproduce_   
_the Ministry of Magic_   
_DISPOSES the institution of a Muggle-Born Registration Commission, with the assignment of_   
_\- conducting a survey on the country's Muggle-Borns by the use of questionnaires and interviews_   
_\- ascertaining how the country's Muggle-Borns have come into possession of magical abilities_   
_INVITES the country's Muggle-Borns to register with the commission_   
_REQUIRES Muggle-Born members of the Ministerial staff to register with the commission_   
_REMINDS that acts undertaken in violation of the present decree or its implementation shall be prosecuted according to..._

At the bottom there was Thicknesse's signature.

Percy contemplated the parchment for a long moment.

There had to be something that he didn't understand. A decree issued by the Ministry of Magic could not seriously require Muggle-Born to register! The idea that a Muggle could _steal magic from a wizard_ was just ridiculous, who would believe such a thing?

He turned the decree so that Miss Swinton could read it too.

Her eyes narrowed more and more as she read. Eventually she looked up with an expression of utter disgust.

"Say again that there's no proof that the Death Eaters have taken over. Say it again, now"

Once again, before Percy could answer, an other purple airplane flew in the office, but this time it landed on Miss Swinton's desk. She opened it with trembling hands. She read it quickly and handed it to Percy without a word.

_Dear Miss Swinton_   
_In accordance with the Ministry's decree Nr. 1 08/1997, you are kindly invited to take part to the Ministry's survey on Muggle-Borns._   
_For that purpose, you are invited to an interview which will take place today at 1 p.m. at the Ministry of Magic, Level One. If the timing is inconvenient, the interview will be scheduled on a different time._   
_Kindly fill the attached questionnaire in its entirety and bring it with you on your interview._   
_We remind you that participation to the survey is compulsory for Ministerial staff. Accordingly, should you fail to show up at the designated time, you would be held for questioning at the Ministry's exit._

_Best Regards_   
_Dolores Jane Umbridge_   
_Senior Undersecretary to the Ministry and Head of the Muggle-Born Registration Commission_

Had Umbridge gone mad? Did she really need an interview to know that a Ravenclaw with top marks such as Miss Swinton hadn't stolen magic from anyone? Held for questioning… this was just _ridiculous_!

He looked at Miss Swinton and noticed that her eyes were full of tears. He couldn't decide whether she looked more miserable or more furious.

"I'm speechless" he said hoarsely "I just... there are no words"

"When I started at Hogwarts I would've _never_ imagined that such a day would come. That I would be threatened because I am Muggle-Born"

She turned her back to him and started to collect her things.

"What are you doing?" he asked.

"It looks like I'm leaving" she answered defiantly.

"But you read the letter. You will be held for questioning" Percy pointed out.

"Fine, then I will _try_ to leave!" she said, finally turning to face him again. She was breathing heavily and her face was red "It's certainly better than being questioned by Umbridge. I cannot imagine why such a horrid woman was appointed Headmistress instead of Dumbledore… my goodness!"

She was beside herself with fury and she was crying openly now.

What if she got caught? What if she got punished just because she was a Muggle-Born practicing magic? And what about the other Muggle-Borns he knew? What was going to happen to his ex-girlfriend Penny, to Hermione Granger, to Dean Thomas? And how would he find the guts to look them in the face again, after he had praised Umbridge and had stood for her?

He felt sick.

"So, unless you have a better idea, I will push my luck" she concluded, grabbing her jacket.

 _But this isn't fair! Where are your_ daring, nerve and chivalry _, Percy? How can you let this happen?_

Miss Swinton had barely taken one step when he made his decision.

"I can help you to get out" he whispered.

She froze and turned to him, her eyes wide.

"Are you aware" she asked in a quivering voice "that, by helping me, you are risking your career and possibly your personal safety?"

"Do you _really_ believe that I would approve of discrimination of Muggle-Borns just for the sake of my _career_?" he asked breathlessly.

He had meant it to be a rhetorical question but Miss Swinton opened her mouth and closed it again after an instant, staring at him.

_She believed precisely that._

On that very moment, they heard the sounds of stilettos approaching. He knew those footsteps.

"It's Umbridge! Leave it to me"

He waved his wand. A second later, Miss Swinton had disappeared and a small hamster looked at him from the floor. Percy picked it up and slipped it into his robe's pocket just before Umbridge peeked in the room.

"Ah, Percy. I trust you received the new decree?" she asked with a sweet smile.

For the first time since he knew her, Percy found it revolting.

"Certainly, Dolores" he answered.

"And where is your secretary?" she went on, looking around.

"I would like to know that!" he replied, trying to sound haughty "She received a memo and left without a word!"

"A less than professional attitude, isn't it?" she said gleefully "But from today on, we will not need to worry about _those people_ anymore. Maybe you are not aware of it, Percy, but your secretary … we should say _former_ secretary, don't you think?... is a Muggle-Born"

"I wouldn't know. We have never discussed personal matters" he said importantly.

"Well, she is a Muggle Born" went on Umbridge. "The former Ministers failed to address the matter, probably because they were too busy dealing with other problems. But the new Minister for Magic has a different opinion and wishes to make some radical change in our approach to Muggle-Borns. Since we are the Minister's entourage, we have to set a good example. _Such people_ shouldn't be working with us" she concluded with a broad smile.

Percy felt a pang of hatred and willed himself not to show it on his face. He began to understand the Hogwarts' students loathing of that woman.

At the usual time, Percy left his office and stepped into a fireplace in the Atrium. Eric Munch, the Watchwizard, waved at him and Percy waved back with a polite smile.

A moment later, he stepped out of the fireplace in his living room, a small hamster resting in his cloak's pocket.


	8. Losing my Religion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After the coup at the Ministry, a distressed Percy tells his secretary about the row with his family.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The title is based on the song "Losing my Religion" by R.E.M.
> 
> "That's me in the corner  
> that's me in the spotlight  
> losing my religion.  
> Trying to keep up with you  
> and I don't know if I can do it.  
> Oh no, I've said too much,  
> I haven't said enough"

**August 2nd 1997**

Percy woke up startled.

 _Oh, he had probably drifted off for a moment,_ he thought. He picked up his watch from the bedside table: three o'clock.

_There was just no way he could sleep this night._

Before he could stop it, his mind wandered back to the evening before, when he had stepped out of his fireplace with a hamster in his cloak's pocket.

_They had made it._

He walked to the kitchenette and closed the door - maybe someone was spying him through the fireplace, it wasn't advisable to stay in the living room. He took the hamster from his cloak and put it gently on the floor, then took out his wand.

"Er... I just need a moment" he told the hamster. It- or rather she- looked back at him almost expectantly, without moving.

He tried very hard to concentrate on what he was about to do but it wasn't easy.

_She believed that he would stand by the new Minister and Umbridge even if they were pureblood supporters, just for the sake of his career._

_Come off it, Percy. You cannot think about that_ now _. Try and do a proper job._

He took a deep breath and waved his wand. A moment later, Miss Swinton stood in his kitchen, stretching her neck and shoulders but otherwise unharmed.

_Oh. Thank goodness he had always been very good at Transfiguration!_

She stared at him without a word for a very long moment. Percy was beginning to fear that she might have kept the hamster's voice.

But then she whispered "Thank you. And sorry. I misjudged you"

Percy stiffened.

He wanted to say _"you're welcome, never mind"_ but he just couldn't. He had needed all of his remaining self-control to perform the Transfiguration correctly and now he felt exhausted.

"Don't worry. You are not the first person who thinks that I am a monster, and certainly not the last one either" he snapped.

"I don't think that you are a monster!" she replied softly.

"Well, if you assume that I would stand by pureblood supporters _for the sake of my career_ , then you are kind of _implying_ that I don't have any principles, don't you think?" he sneered.

"I am truly sorry for hurting you" she answered with the same soft voice.

"And I told you not to worry. My own father thinks that I would _sell my family_ for my career, you see, so there _must_ be something in me that makes me despicable!"

His face felt very warm, it was certainly red by now. He turned with a huff and pulled out the kettle, feeling the need to keep his hands full.

"OK, let me do that" she said, gesturing to the kettle.

"What do you mean?"

"Let me _make tea_ , what does it look like?" she replied.

Percy stared at her.

"But the Ministry is looking for you… maybe you should…"

What should Muggle-Borns do now? Go into hiding? Take the risk and undergo questioning about _how they had stolen magic?_

To his surprise, Miss Swinton laughed softly. She shook her head and looked almost condescendingly at him.

"I saw this coming, remember? I was positive that I might need to go into hiding soon and I've packed weeks ago. I've set every possible Defensive Charm on my flat. I just need to gather my luggage and Apparate far from London. And you look like you shouldn't be alone right now"

With that, she took the kettle from his hands.

Percy wanted dearly to contradict her but she was right.

He had believed that the Ministry was strong, that Umbridge was cutesy but otherwise alright, that they were going to win the battle against He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named… everything he had believed in was gone.

_And from tomorrow on, there will be just me, Thicknesse and Umbridge._

No. He didn't want Audrey to go and leave him completely alone.

He watched silently while she made tea and after a few minutes they were sitting in front of two steaming mugs.

"Once again, I am sorry for misjudging you. Accept the apology if you wish, but please don't say that it's fine because it is not. You saved me from a huge trouble and you may even have just saved my life" she said seriously.

"Very well. Apologies accepted, then" he answered.

"That's better" she approved, starting to sip her tea.

They were both silent for some time, then she put her mug on the table with a soft thud and looked at him.

"You know" she began "I come from a working class family. My parents never had much money and we -my brother and I- always wore hand-me-downs and had second hand schoolbooks. And we knew that if the car had broken our parents would've had trouble finding the money to repair it. I have always wanted to do something with my life. I wanted to make my family proud of my accomplishments. I wanted to overcome that uneasy feeling I had experienced so many times in my youth, that I needed to live in the moment because the future was uncertain" she paused and looked at him.

"I can relate to it" he answered softly.

"I know" she replied simply "I studied really hard, I had top marks, I had _goals_... and now? All of the _"Outstanding"_ and _"Exceeding Expectations"_ in my N.E.W.T.s mean nothing because I am Muggle-born!" the tears of rage appeared once more in her eyes. "I cannot go back to my family. I would endanger them. Besides, since I am already on my own and don't depend on them anymore, they are investing on my brother's education now. I have no perspectives in the Muggle world and now I don't have any in the Wizarding one as well. I just..." she sighed heavily "I know that my career is not the worst problem at the moment but I... I thought my future was in _this world_ , and _this world_ has failed me"

Percy grimaced.

"I failed you as well" he said.

"I didn't mean it like that…" she started, but he interrupted her.

"It's not about what _you mean_. I trusted the Ministry, I always have. I've never imagined that it could embrace a pureblood agenda, that it could be corrupted, that it could fall. I couldn't believe it until the very last moment. And now you must go into hiding, and other people with you. And I don't know what will happen to the ones who won't. It's not the first time that I... I believed that Dumbledore was plotting against the Ministry, that Harry Potter was mental and that my family was siding with criminals. I... I think very much but apparently I always come to the wrong conclusion!"

Percy averted his eyes from Miss Swinton and fixed them on the mug in his hands.

It was unlike him to ramble and stutter like this. He had always been proud of his eloquence and vocabulary and now he couldn't make sense.

"Listen. You are not the only one who made a blunder. I was still at Hogwarts the year after the Triwizard Tournament. I saw how wicked Umbridge was, especially after she became Headmistress, and I knew that Dumbledore was not mental at all. Otherwise, I am not sure that I would have believed Harry Potter as readily as I did. And I have to admit - I was skeptical until I attended Umbridge's first lesson" she confessed.

"Harry Potter has spent almost every holiday at my family's home, was in Gryffindor like me, was best friends with my brother and saved my sister from the Chamber of Secrets risking his life. I do think that he is reckless and hot-headed sometimes. But I ought to have known that he was not insane. The truth is..."

Percy paused and swallowed. He had spoken with such heat that his throat was dry.

"...the truth is that I told myself what I wanted to hear. My job situation was very unstable and believing Harry Potter was not going to help it. And I wanted to move up at all costs…" he whispered miserably.

There was another long pause.

_He wasn't going to break down now. He wasn't going to make a fool of himself._

"Have you ever tried to... make it up with your family?" Audrey asked gingerly.

Percy huffed.

"Sorry, you don't have to..." she started.

"No, it's fine. It just annoys me that everybody knows that."

Once he wanted to _make sure that everybody knew that_ , and now...

"I just... one of your twin brothers once expressed his opinion on Umbridge before class and... John Turpin asked him why you were supporting her on the press... that's why I know about the row" she said apologetically.

Percy didn't want to discuss it with her, he really didn't. But the words seemed to just come out, like they had done with his father two years before.

"I had a... really nasty fight with my father after Fudge promoted me to his junior assistant. He told me that Fudge just wanted to spy on our family and on Dumbledore because Dumbledore and him were close. I... I have to admit that he was probably right about that, but the way he said it was just... the idea that I could deserve a promotion seemed to not even cross his mind. On the other hand he seemed convinced that I could sell my family"

Audrey listened attentively. Her eyes shape and the thin nose which made her look slightly strict now gave her an air of utter concentration.

"And then... you know, my mother is the one who yells in my family. My father rarely raises his voice and when even it is just a burst and then it's gone. I have never heard him yell as much as he did with me on that day. It was like... like he had been bottling up hostility for years and was finally letting lose. Then I answered in kind. I told him that he was a fool for following Dumbledore and for believing Harry Potter. I said the things I had kept to myself for years. I said that one who decides to have seven children should be able to provide for them. I practically called him a failure, although I didn't use that word. I said that his absolute lack for ambition was the reason why we were so poor. Now he has been promoted, by the way - with his brightness and dedication he could have been promoted centuries ago, at least I give him credit for that! I said that I had to fight against my family's reputation at the Ministry - it was true but I wouldn't have said it if I hadn't been so furious. I just rubbed it in his face"

Audrey had covered her mouth with one hand.

"My siblings -the ones who were there- were utterly shocked and listened without participating. But it was clear that they all sided with my father no ifs and buts. I have never been anybody's favourite sibling, I daresay. I reckon our relationship deteriorated even more after I graduated from Hogwarts and started working. My mother... she appealed for calm from both of us but it was too late for that"

All of a sudden, Percy noticed that he had been talking for several minutes non-stop.

"I am sorry" he said hastily "You asked me a question and I still haven't answered"

"No, it's alright" she said in a low voice "it looks like you needed to talk about it. Go on"

"There isn't much left to say. I felt hostility - I felt there had already been hostility towards me even prior to that argument. Apparently, everybody believed me to be a moron. I left on the very same evening. And no, I haven't tried to reconcile. I know that they still... love me, that nobody wants me dead or something like that. But trying to reconcile would not fix everything or mend the wounds"

"You _are_ aware that reconciling could become difficult if there was a war, aren't you?"

He sighed.

"Yes. I just... I don't think I can face any of them right now. Almost two years ago, my father had a serious accident and I... I didn't visit him at the hospital because I believed that he was putting the family at risk by believing Dumbledore. It seemed to make sense back then. I... I tried to split my brother Ron and Harry Potter apart for the same reason. I just cannot"

He considered telling her about the parsnip his siblings had thrown at him on Christmas but he decided against it. He didn't need to be _pathetic_.

"I'm sorry" she said after a long silence.

"It's alright. You were very kind to listen given the situation"

They finished their tea in silence.

Percy couldn't say whether he felt better or worse. Although many people knew that he had cut ties with his family, he had never really talked about the row with anyone _(And with whom should he have talked about it? With non-existent friends and significant persons?_ ). For now it made him feel oddly relieved. The night, however, was going to be a different story.

Eventually, Audrey put her mug on the table again and stood.

"Now I have to go. Thank you for everything and pay attention"

"You too" he answered. It was surreal, telling a highly competent witch to pay attention because she was Muggle-Born...

"Hold on, where do you do groceries?" she asked out of the blue.

"I beg your pardon?"

"Where do you do groceries?" she asked again.

"I used to do them here in Diagon Alley but the shop closed. Now I go to the supermarket on the corner left to the Leaky Cauldron. But I fail to see…"

"In case I ever needed to contact you" she explained without letting him finish. She waved at him with a smile and then Disapparated with a small pop.

_Now he was really alone._


	9. Quiet Resource

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In a Ministry of Magic led by Death Eaters, Percy tries to survive and to join the fight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The title is inspired by the song "Quiet Resource" by Evelyn Stein.

**2 August 1997 - December 1997**

At five o'clock, Percy decided that it didn't make sense to stay in bed any longer.

In front of a double dose of the coffee he liked to drink in the morning, he considered whether he should go to work or not.

_What were the alternatives?_

Going into hiding in the Muggle world like Miss Swinton? But he wasn't Muggle-Born. His knowledge of the Muggle world was based on his father's tales and on his Muggle Studies' course. He was barely able to do groceries at a Muggle supermarket without raising suspicion.

Besides, what would happen to his family if he disappeared? The Ministry would assume that Percy was at their house.

Maybe he should do exactly that, going back to his family.

He sighed deeply, burying his face in his hands.

_He couldn't do that._

Pride had kept him from visiting Bill at the Hospital Wing and from attending his wedding. But the thing that kept him from going home now wasn't pride, it was shame. He should've gone home after realising that Fudge had been wrong. Or on Christmas Day, the year before. Or when Bill was injured. _How could he dare to go home now? How could he face any of them?_

He should've never left. If he had never left, now he would be fighting He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named like his family was undoubtedly doing.

_But now it was too late._

OOO

The sleepless nights which previously occurred only when he was very distressed were now daily business. Percy couldn't even remember the last time he'd slept properly.

Every day, the Ministry became slightly more wicked and corrupted than the day before. Every day he was supposed to tolerate a new and more terrible insult.

The Fountain of Magical Brethren was replaced by a new statue portraying Muggles crushed under the thrones of a witch and a wizard. At first, many people stared at it in horror but after a while the staff got used to distractedly pass by it, without a glance at the inscription " _Magic is Might_ ". People went to Level One for questioning on a daily basis and often they didn't come back. Severus Snape -a known Death Eater- had been appointed Headmaster of Hogwarts, where now Muggle-Borns were not allowed.

 _They were getting used to this so quickly_ … or maybe it was just his impression.

Percy felt strange. It was like a thick veil had been lifted from his eyes when he had helped Audrey escape. Like he was seeing everything for the first time.

On the first day of work after Audrey's escape, he immediately understood the new Minister's blank stare and demeanour: it was _obvious_ that he had been Imperiused. _Which seemed to be a common feature of his bosses_ , thought Percy with a grimace. Until just one day before, he would have never believed that the Minister for Magic himself had been Imperiused but now it was crystal clear.

When he met Dawlish for the first time after the coup, he knew that the Auror was under the Imperius Curse as well. Dawlish had become a different person, more subdued, less talkative. He was like a puppet, who did what he was ordered to do and didn't care for anything else. This wasn't the Dawlish he knew.

Yaxley and Runcorn, the new members of the Minister's entourage, were Death Eaters, plain and simple.

_And then there was Umbridge._

Percy could barely recognize himself as the person who had praised her on the Daily Prophet. She dedicated herself to sending Muggle-Borns to Azkaban with an enthusiasm that disgusted him more than the Death Eaters could do. The campiness that covered her atrocities made him sick.

Maybe Audrey had been right. Maybe he would have believed Potter and Dumbledore more readily if he had experienced Umbridge's behaviour at Hogwarts.

 _Or maybe not_ , he told himself with a snort.

The violence of his hatred for that woman surprised him. He had never experience such a fierce desire to curse somebody. When someone broke into the Ministry and hexed Umbridge at the beginning of September, he was displeased to hear that she was still alive. The thought that he was really hoping for someone to die gave him chills.

But the thing that made him lose his sleep was the way people behaved with _him_.

Thicknesse, Umbdrige, Yaxley, everybody treated him like he was inoffensive, oblivious, _trustworthy_. For the new Minister, Percy Weasley wasn't someone to worry about, he wasn't a threat like his siblings or parents. He was just a _harmless moron_.

Percy tried very hard to avert his thoughts from the self-loathing he felt. He welcomed with joy the realisation, made one day after work, that somebody was watching him - so the Ministry _had_ some reservations about him!

He tried to avoid his father as much as possible but, despite his efforts, it didn't _always_ work. In a way, it was comforting - at least he knew that his father was still alive, and likely the rest of his family as well. But at the same time it was an ordeal which left Percy distressed and on the verge of breakdown every time. There was a particularly painful meeting one day - Percy stepped into the lift and noticed that his father was there as well when the lift was already moving. They weren't alone, thankfully - Runcorn was there as well - and Percy stepped out of the lift at the first stop, blushing furiously. He couldn't imagine what his father could have done or said to him if they had been alone.

Percy kept doing his usual job - keeping the Ministry's schedule, opening his mail (well, apart from the personal one) and writing reports. He hadn't gotten a new secretary yet, despite Umbridge's grievances to the Ministry about the fact that _he had to do all of that work alone_. No, he would rather stay alone than share his office with a secretary chosen by Umbridge, thank you very much.

Very soon, Percy felt the desire to join the fight but he needed almost two months to bring himself to do it.

Yes, he needed to overcome his distaste for rule-breaking but that wasn't the main point - he had already done it by helping Audrey escape and breaking rules in a Ministry led by Death Eaters didn't really look wrong. The point was that he didn't wish to die like _that_. Yes, his siblings and parents were certainly risking their lives but they did it to fight He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named. If he died now, he would have been remembered as _the renegade Weasley who worked for the Death Eaters' puppet_. If he died now, he wouldn't be able to say sorry to his family. And if he had tried to do something against the Ministry, he would've likely been caught - oblivious as he was, he would not be able to cover his tracks.

And then, one day, his Gryffindor nerve prevailed.

By pure chance, he found himself in the lift with Martin Cobb from Magical Maintenance whom he remembered from Hogwarts. He had been a Hufflepuff, probably five or six years older than him. He recalled Umbridge mentioning him as one of the Muggle-Borns who had a hearing on the following day. Before his head could think, his hand acted. A minute later, a Confounded Martin Cobb emerged from the lift, persuaded that he had to go into hiding.

Sometimes he was even more daring. One day he ran into Sylvia Mills of Magical Transportation, a Muggle-Born who was also scheduled for questioning. Percy took the chance and whispered "leave the country before your hearing. Do it now". On the following day, he was pleased to hear that she hadn't showed up for questioning.

Percy didn't try to do anything on purpose - his lack of confidence in his strategic abilities kept him from doing so. He rather made use of casual meetings with Muggle-Borns and people who could help, like Watchwizards. Most of all, he tried not to get Imperiused too. He tried his best to look unimportant - just someone who opens mail and arranges schedules - and to avoid being alone with people who appeared dodgy. Provided that he was able to judge that… 

OOO

Doing groceries before Christmas in the Muggle Supermarket was distasteful, thought Percy. It was packed with people and it was difficult to have his wand at hand without looking weird. He glanced around to see if anybody was acting suspiciously - Death Eaters and their lot didn't know much about the Muggle world and they were likely to make mistakes - but he saw nothing out of the ordinary. There were two families with kids, some couples, a boy with dreadlocks and an old lady with a walking stick, all of them dressed in a perfect Muggle style and looking at ease in the Muggle supermarket.

But once at home, while he was unpacking his eggs, he realised that there _had_ been another person with magical powers at the supermarket.

The inside of the egg carton had a message that disappeared as soon as Percy read it:

_"Turn on your radio on 7 and think of a password. Hamster"_

The signature _Hamster_ left no doubt about who the author was. But there hadn't been any young lady at the supermarket! The boy with dreadlocks… or maybe the elderly lady, who had stood for quite a while next to his shopping cart, studying the supermarket's choice of cheese. Now that he thought about it, she looked a little bit like Audrey, maybe she had done an Aging Charm, she was good at Charms...

Was somebody trying to contact him through the radio? Or was there a channel supporting the fighters?

And what did " _think of a password_ " mean? Was he supposed to invent one or to guess one?

At 7 p.m., he sat at his kitchen table with the magical radio in front of him, unsure of what to do.

He scrolled the thumbwheel slowly and found magical stations transmitting Christmas music and love songs as well as advice against " _Mudblood Danger_ ". But sometimes the frequencies were just silent or disturbed. Was the intended channel hidden there?

But he also needed a password. If this channel was somehow supporting the fighters, then possible passwords would be related to it. He tried with "Harry Potter", "Albus Dumbledore", "Order of the Phoenix" and even his father's name but nothing he did worked.

Still, if Audrey had decided to contact him, there had to be something.

He tried for the following two evenings and even on 7 a.m., without result. On the third evening, when he was starting to become desperate, he heard something new as soon as he said " _Phoenix_ ".

"Good evening, dear listeners! Do you feel this Christmas spirit? No? Me neither" said a voice that Percy recognized immediately. It was Lee Jordan.

He felt something warm in his chest. So there was something beyond the Ministry, the Death Eaters, the Dementors. There was somebody fighting out there, and it didn't matter that Lee Jordan would have probably punched Percy if he had met him.

"Let's start this episode with some news about Hogwarts, where the Dumbledore Army's giving the Headmaster a hard time. He is as fond of them as he is of personal hygiene! If you are listening, mind that Dumbledore's Army is still recruiting, as you can now read on several walls at Hogwarts"

_The same Dumbledore Army he had once tried to stop was now fighting against the Death Eaters. Bless them._

Lee kept talking for another while, then introduced other two people whose voices Percy immediately recognized. One was Professor Lupin and the other was Kingsley Shacklebolt, who managed to sound calming even at a time like this. They filled the listeners in about wanted wizards, the Death Eaters' crimes against Muggles and Muggle-Borns and the last news about He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named. Lee had adopted the same style he used when covering Quidditch matches at Hogwarts and despite the situation he found himself smirking a couple of times.

When the program was over, half an hour later, Percy felt better than he had in months.


	10. Once in a Lifetime

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Percy finds it increasingly difficult to work at the Ministry and makes a radical decision

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The title is inspired by the song "Once in a Lifetime" by Talking Heads:
> 
> "You may ask yourself: where does that highway go to?  
> And you may ask yourself: am I right? Am I wrong?  
> And you may say yourself: my God, what have I done?...  
> … once in a lifetime, water flowing underground"

**January 1998 - May 1998**

_It was the umpteenth sleepless night._ There had been a time when he could lie in bed and fall asleep instantly instead of dwelling for hours, but it was so long ago that he couldn't remember it.

A few hours before, Margaret Wadelin had been sent to Azkaban after her questioning. She had been in his year at Hogwarts, she had tried the Sorting Hat just before him.

He recalled her eleven years old face, round and smiling under the Hat when he cried "Ravenclaw!" and sighed heavily.

 _Another innocent person he hadn't been able to help._ He could try and help people who worked for the Ministry but he had no way to approach the other ones.

_He wanted to do more than that._

He had even considered approaching his father but he had concluded that it was too dangerous. Everybody knew that they weren't on speaking terms, if they had been as much as seen alone in the same place, the Minister would have known. The last thing he wanted was to endanger his family.

Percy found increasingly difficult to wear his mask of indifference. Until the coup, he had been able to put his thoughts and emotions aside when the situation required it. Yes, he dwelled too much on every little thing and got easily paranoid but at least he did so in the privacy of his flat. Now a racing hurt and a burning stomach pain were with him all the time and he feared that, sooner or later, he would lose his facade and be caught.

But every time he felt on the verge of breaking down, something kept him going. He was a Gryffindor and -after all- a Weasley, _he had to be a fighter_ , and this included fighting against his exhaustion, his fear, his shame.

He didn't know how he would manage without Potterwatch Listening to the voices of other people who were fighting made him feel at peace even after the most horrible working days. Percy had already appreciated Shacklebolt's calmness on the many occasions when they had met and in a short time the Auror became his favourite of the three speakers. His deep and reassuring voice made Percy almost forget that there was a war going on and somehow he was sure that Shacklebolt's tranquillity was not only exterior like his own.

Percy recalled that Shacklebolt had been there as well when they had tried to arrest Dumbledore - _was he already on Dumbledore's side back then? Had the Auror been a member of the Order of the Phoenix all along?_

_Maybe there were other members of the Order at the Ministry. Maybe someone was trying to let the Muggle-Borns escape just as he was doing._

With that thought in mind, he was even able to sleep for four hours without waking up.

OOO

At the end of March, Potterwatch wasn't able to transmit for several days and Percy was going insane.

_Why? Had they all been caught? Were they in Azkaban, or maybe already dead?_

Then finally, one evening, he heard Lee's familiar voice again. He learned several things - that the Radio hadn't transmitted because of visits the Death Eaters, that Dean Thomas was missing, that Dirk Cresswell -a friend of his father's- had been killed. Percy's thoughts wandered to Penny, Hermione Granger, Audrey, the other Muggle-Borns he had met at Hogwarts and at the Ministry. _How many of them were already dead?_

 _And where was Harry Potter? What was he doing?_ Percy couldn't understand why, but Potter seemed to be as crucial during this second battle as he had been during the first one. It had probably something to do with the prophecy that the Death Eaters had tried to steal at the Department of Mysteries.

Lee then announced that the radio had a new guest. Percy's heart skipped a beat: could it be one of his siblings or his father?

And indeed, a moment later Percy recognized Fred's voice.

They hadn't spoken in almost three years and the twins had been seventeen then, but there was no doubt: this was Fred. Percy had always been able to tell the twins apart.

Percy wiped his eyes while Fred made some silly joke about the fact that He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named could not kill with a glance since he was not a Basilisk.

His relationship with the twins had never been easy, not even during their childhood. Since he could remember, they had been completely different from him. He was quiet, enjoyed being alone with books, acted older than he was and didn't see the point in reckless adventures and pranks. So, whenever they did something together, either they pulled pranks at him or he yelled at them - or both, actually. But the mild annoyance he felt when he was seven or eight years old had turned into haughtiness and then resentment. The crux of the matter, thought Percy, had been the twins' refusal to take anything seriously: school, rules, authority and Percy's feelings. But they seemed to be taking very seriously this fight.

That night, he didn't sleep.

OOO

Shortly after the Easter Holidays, Percy noticed something that gave him chills.

_He hadn't spotted his father for several days._

He assumed that the family was safe since Fred was still transmitting on Radio Potter and his mood was as cheerful as usual. Some days later, Percy heard the rumor that his brother Ron and Hermione Granger were with Harry Potter and concluded that the family had probably gone into hiding.

The Ministry had turned even more wicked, if that was even possible. Now, the few people who still dared to oppose the Minister in any way were accused of being Muggle-Born and sent to Azkaban without even pretending to respect procedures. Runcorn and Yaxley threatened people with imprisonment and torture without needing an excuse.

There was no way Percy could stay much longer. Eventually they would get him too, maybe they would order him to curse or torture someone, he would refuse and be killed straight away or Kissed by a Dementor.

_No, he had to join the fighters, late as it might be._

But what was he supposed to do? He didn't even try to go to the Burrow - if the family had gone into hiding, either they were not there or they had done a Fidelius Charm, so it was pointless to try.

His only contact with the fighters was Potterwatch, but of course the speakers never told where they were or what they were up to.

There was, however, a place they mentioned in every single episode: _Hogwarts_. They always seemed to know very well what was going on there - either they had a spy among the staff or students, or they were watching the school closely.

_Yes, but he could not simply go to Hogwarts and knock on the door._

But he could go to Hogsmeade.

_And then do what?_

After a moment, the answer presented itself to him.

Rita Skeeter had written about Dumbledore's family and about a brother, who was called Aberforth. Percy happened to know that the barman at the Hog's Head was also called Aberforth. And Aberforth was not exactly an usual first name.

Percy had never been at the Hog's Head and didn't know the barman but he had trouble imagining Dumbledore's brother as a Death Eater.

Maybe the man knew where the fighters were hiding or what they were doing.

Yes, he had to admit that it was a reckless idea. Someone might follow him, the barman might know nothing about the fighters. On the other hand, working at the Ministry right now was, if possible, even more reckless unless one was a Death Eater.

And so, on a gloomy Sunday morning, Percy Disapparated from his flat.

OOO

He knew where the Hog's Head was but he decided not to Apparate in front of it. Instead, he apparated on the border of Hogsmeade and went to the pub by foot.

It was quite early in the morning and the weather was rather foggy. Percy didn't meet a soul until he reached the pub's entrance. It was open and empty.

Suddenly, he heard footsteps and an old man appeared behind the counter. The resemblance with Dumbledore wasn't striking but the light blue eyes were exactly the same - only that the barman's ones were not twinkling.

Now that he was here, Percy didn't know what to do. He had imagined that he would find the words but he didn't.

He ordered a coffee and sipped it in silence while the barman prepared sandwiches and got rid of empty bottles.

Feeling helpless, he was about to leave when the barman spoke out of the blue.

"You a Weasley?" he asked.

Percy considered the question. _Was he a Weasley?_

"Yes" he said slowly.

"You're the one who works at the Ministry?"

"Yes" said Percy again.

The barman fell silent again and Percy wondered whether Aberforth despised him or just didn't care.

But then came another question.

"You told Sylvia Mills to run away?"

"Yes!" answered Percy, surprised "but _how_ …?"

Aberforth interrupted him: "Not important"

"Has she managed… to run away?" asked Percy after a while. He needed to know that.

"Yes" said Aberforth tersely.

Percy leaned back on the chair with a sigh.

_Could he trust this man? Yes, he knew about Sylvia Mills but maybe it was because he had tortured her..._

"If you're looking for your sister, she is not at school anymore" the barman muttered after a while.

"I'm not surprised. My father disappeared too"

"Then why are you here at this time in the morning?"

Percy didn't know what to say. Why had he come to the Hog's Head, of all places? How could he explain it to the barman?

"Because of your surname" he answered eventually.

"Then you're wrong" said Aberforth in a harsh voice.

_So he wasn't involved at all? But then why he knew Sylvia Mills?_

"I don't think I'm wrong" he whispered.

The barman fell silent again and Percy knew that, whatever the reason, the conversation was over.

He stood and paid.

"Hold on, what's your name again?" asked Aberforth.

"Percy"

"Percy as in Fudge's assistant?"

"Yes" he answered hastily, trying not to meet Aberforth's gaze.

The barman grunted in a way that didn't sound complimentary.

"I'll give you a holler if something comes up" said Aberforth just before Percy walked out of the pub.

Percy turned behind but Aberforth was preparing what looked like a punch and didn't raise his eyes from the counter.

As soon as he was outside, he Disapparated.

OOO

The next day, at work, Percy felt even more nervous than usual. What if someone had seen him in Hogsmeade? What if today was his turn to go to Azkaban or to be killed?

But nothing extraordinary happened. Umbridge performed the daily horror show on Level One, Yaxley threatened some clerks to send their families to Azkaban, brochures about the _Mudblood Danger_ and Harry Potter were copied. The usual.

After a couple of weeks, Percy was finally positive that nobody had spotted him at the Hog's Head. On the other hand, Aberforth hadn't contacted him yet. Was it because there was nothing to do or because the barman didn't trust him? Well, either way, there was nothing he could do but wait.

He sighed, turning to lie on the other side. It was useless, he knew it - he wasn't going to sleep in any case. He might as well stand up and read someth...

_…what was that glow coming from the living room?_

Percy stood swiftly and picked his wand from the night table. Maybe somebody had broken into his flat.

He was unprepared for the sight that welcomed him in the living room. A Patronus that looked like a giant goat was waiting for him and it spoke with Aberforth's voice as soon as he appeared.

_"Battle at Hogwarts. Come to the pub"_

Percy needed a moment to process the information. _Battle at Hogwarts?! Why? The Death Eaters? He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named himself?_

If he went to Hogwarts now, he would lose his job and be left without a place to live. He would likely meet his family and face humiliation. He could get himself killed.

_He didn't care._

He didn't care for his job, his flat, his pride.

He wanted to be on the right side and to do the right thing, once in a lifetime. He wanted to be at Hogwarts as soon as possible.

He dressed hastily, threw a cloak on his shoulders and grabbed his wand. A moment later, he was standing outside Aberforth's pub.


	11. Turn to Stone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Percy joins the Battle at Hogwarts and has some quality time with his brother Fred

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The title is inspired by the song "Turn to Stone" by Ingrid Michaelson

**1st May - 2nd May 1998**

As soon as he Apparated, Aberforth's hands pulled him inside.

"Quick, boy! You want the Death Eaters to see you?"

Before Percy could answer, the barman glanced outside and shook his head "There aren't any more of them, they're all at Hogwarts by now"

"What's going on?" asked Percy.

"You-Know-Who and the Death Eaters are going to attack the castle" Aberforth explained tersely.

"But _why_?"

"Because Harry Potter's in there"

Percy noticed that the barman had guided him in front of a painting portraying a young girl, which moved to reveal a secret passage.

"This tunnel will bring you inside the school. You'd better hurry up, I don't know whether the battle has started already"

Percy had no idea that there was a secret passage between Hogwarts and the Hog's Head. This was the kind of thing Fred and George would know for sure...  
The tunnel was very dark and he tried to stay focused while he walked. For all he knew, Death Eaters could be hidden there as well.

After about ten minutes, he finally saw a light at a distance. He climbed out of the tunnel eagerly but miscalculated the exit's height and lost his balance.

Holding on a chair for support, he noticed that he was in a crowded room.

"Am I too late? Has it started? I only just found out, so I-"

He stood up and looked around… _and the sentence died in his throat._

His whole family -except from Ron and Charlie- was there. So were Harry Potter, Fleur Delacour and Professor Lupin.

Of course, he was expecting to see his family there but not so suddenly, not all of them together!

For a long moment, they just looked at each other. Percy registered that Fleur was asking Professor Lupin about a baby but her words seemed to come from a long distance.

He could have used the time in the tunnel to prepare something to tell them!

But then, somehow, the words arrived.

"I was a fool! I was an idiot, I was a pompous prat, I was a-a..."

" _A ministry-loving, family-disowning, power hungry moron_!" said Fred.

His expression was quite fierce and Percy swallowed.

"Yes, I was!" he admitted.

With his enormous surprise, Fred replied "Well, you can't say fairer than that" and shook his hand.

Percy was completely taken aback. He had expected that the twins would be the last ones to forgive him, that they would shout at him, maybe even punch him.

_Did he really just need to apologize in order to be forgiven?_

His thoughts were interrupted when his mother shoved Fred aside and ran into his arms, bursting into tears. Percy hesitantly returned the embrace, while she hugged him so tight that he could barely had never doubted that his mother would forgive him. _His father, on the other side..._

His father hadn't said a word or made a move yet, he just stared blankly at him.

An apology could not mend what had happened between them and Percy whispered "I'm sorry, Dad" convinced that his father would turn his back to him and walk away.

But he didn't. He stayed still for a moment and then ran to him, hugging him even more tightly than his mother had. Once his parents finally let him go, it was his siblings' turn to shake his hand or pat him on the back. It looked like he had never left. Glancing around, he met the eyes of Oliver Wood, who was standing next to Angelina Johnson. He waved his hand with a smile and Percy waved back.

 _You could've swallowed your pride a little earlier, Percy_ he told himself, wiping his eyes again.

OOO

After another ten minutes, they were all sitting in the Great Hall together with the students, teachers and other members of the Order of the Phoenix.

Professor McGonagall was overseeing the evacuation of the students, many of which -even if underage- wanted to stay and fight.

Suddenly, a high-pitched, cold and loud voice filled the Hall. Although Percy had never heard his voice before, he knew that this was He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named. Many people looked around, searching for the source of the voice, but somehow Percy knew without looking that the Dark Wizard wasn't there. The voice seemed to come out of thin air.

He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named urged the students not to fight and asked them to give him Harry Potter. The Slytherins looked quite forthcoming and one of them, Pansy Parkinson, openly suggested to grab Harry and turn him in. But the students from the other three houses stood to defend Harry, wand in hand.

Percy glanced at Harry, who stood at a short distance. It was unusual to see him alone, without Ron and Hermione Granger. Where where they? He hadn't seen them so far.

His thoughts were interrupted by Kingsley Shacklebolt, who had naturally taken the lead and was giving instructions to the fighters from the teachers' platform. _If we defeat them, I know who will be the next Minister for Magic_ , thought Percy looking at the Auror.

Percy had assumed that he would be scared at some point. He felt that a part of him was indeed scared, but for now he could detach himself from this part of him, as if it were another person. He was not nearly as terrified as he had been on every single day since the coup.

As time went by, he felt more and more in his element. He knew the school, he knew all of the oder students who had decided to stay and fight.

 _"We do look to our Prefects to take a lead at times such as these"_ George had told him earlier, half-jokingly.

 _You bet you do_ , thought Percy, smiling to himself.

OOO

After Kingsley's speech, they divided into groups. The twins went to see about the secret passages, Bill, Fleur and his parents went to the grounds together, Percy and other Gryffindors followed Professor McGonagall up to the Gryffindor tower.

Percy remembered the contemptuous way McGonagall had looked at him during their last meeting, at Dumbledore's funeral. _This wasn't the moment to dwell on it. He had to focus his whole attention on fighting._

He was silent on the way to Gryffindor Tower. The others - Oliver, Angelina, Alicia and Katie and McGonagall- knew very well what had happened with his family, what he had done.

But, like his family, the fellow Gryffindors looked sincerely pleased to see him. Maybe it was just the emotion of the moment, maybe they were going to despise him again afterwards. But for now he felt fine.

They did their very best on the tower. McGonagall even complimented him for his spells and Percy almost expected her to say _"ten points to Gryffindor"_

Still, although he didn't want to be the voice of doom, it was clearly just a matter of time before they broke into the school. The Death Eaters were more numerous than them.

"It makes no sense to remain here, they are breaking into the school" Professor McGonagall said grudgingly after a while "We have to divide and duel"

Two Death Eaters were already there when they climbed out of the hole behind the portrait, McGonagall leading. She barely moved her wand and the resulting jinx was so violent that both Death Eaters were thrown on the floor before they could react.

They had reached the sixth floor when Percy heard a voice calling him.

He turned to see Fred, smiling broadly.

"Excellent! Care to join me? I'm alone and I could use a duelling partner, you never know"

Percy was almost shocked. He expected that the twins would stick together like they always did, even more so at such a time.

"Where is George?" he asked Fred while they walked along the corridor.

"When I left him, he was on the third floor with Lee Jordan. No idea where they are right now"

Did Fred really want _him_ as a duelling partner?

He felt close to Fred like he had never felt before, not even when they were children. There had been a time when the thought of the twins made him want to huff and roll his eyes in annoyance, but not now.

"I listened to Potterwatch" he blurted out.

" _Really_?" asked Fred, sounding quite surprised.

"Yes, I started listening to it before Christmas and never missed an episode. It was nice to know that there was something beyond the Ministry, especially after some tough days" explained Percy.

They were silent for some time. Percy stretched his ears but he could only hear screeches and explosions at a distance.

"Maybe we should go back upstairs. This corridor looks quiet"

Fred nodded and they headed upstairs.

A hooded figure was running down the stairs. Fred lifted his wand and yelled " _Petrificus totalu_ s" before the Death Eater could react. He tried to strike back but it was too late and he fell backwards with a loud thud.

"How did you find out about the radio? It isn't easy if you don't have contacts with people of the Order" asked Fred as if nothing had happened.

Percy hesitated. How could he explain that without mentioning what he had done for Audrey?

"A colleague told me about that" he said eventually.

"A _colleague_? I don't think your colleagues belong to the Order"

"I don't think she belongs to the Order and I have no idea how she found you. I didn't have a chance to ask, she just left me a note"

"How did she leave you a _note_?"

While they patrolled the seventh floor, Percy told Fred about Audrey's visit at the supermarket before Christmas, omitting how he had helped her escape. Fred didn't look very convinced.

"She risked to get caught just to tell you about a radio? _Audrey Swinton the Ravenclaw Prefect?_ She was in my year and she didn't look like the type who takes a risk lightly"

Percy didn't know how to answer to this and he felt himself blushing. He hoped that Fred wouldn't notice… _oh, how silly of him!_

" _Ahhhh_ …" said Fred winking "she's your _girlfriend_ "

"She's not my _girlfriend_!" said Percy defiantly "It's not about that!"

"Then what are you _not_ telling me?"

Percy sighed uncomfortably.

"It was probably a way of thanking… I sort of… well, I... helped her escape"

He expected Fred to be surprised at the news that he had broken rules in the very heart of the Ministry but Fred wasn't.

"What happened?"

"Well, she… got an invitation for questioning and I... turned her into a hamster and carried her home in my cloak's pocket" Percy explained tersely.

The rest of the corridor was empty and they walked back to the stairs.

"Anyway you should think about it when the war is over" said Fred suddenly.

"About what?"

" _About asking her out_ , Percy! You helped her, alright, but she still wasn't compelled to take such a risk just to make you listen to a radio program. She _fancies_ you - after all, Ravenclaws _are_ known for being weird…"

" _Ha. Ha._ " snorted Percy "Believe me, at work she didn't treat me like she fancied me, on the con…" he suddenly fell silent and raised his wand.

They heard the sound of footsteps not far from them and a moment later three Death Eaters emerged from the stairs.

He and Fred cried "Stupefy!" at the same moment. Percy's jinx hit the Death Eater in the middle, who fell on his back, while Fred's one barely missed the one on the right side, who jumped behind a statue just in time.

Percy turned his attention on the Death Eater on the left, whose gesturing looked oddly familiar.

His Death Eater's hook fell off his head, revealing Pius Thicknesse.

"Hello, Minister!" greeted Percy "did I mention I'm resigning?"

"You are joking, Perce!" said Fred with a delighted laugh while his opponent fell to the ground. "You actually _are_ joking, Perce! I don't think I ever heard you joke since you were…"

There was a sudden, terrifying screech and the wall behind them exploded. Percy fell on his knees while Fred was hit by the debris and fell on the ground.

 _That was hard, he's certainly unconscious_ thought Percy rushing to his brother.

_But Fred was too still to be unconscious. His eyes were still open, his face smiling._

Percy felt himself scream with a voice that he didn't recognise as his own one.

He registered that Ron and Harry were trying to pull him away from Fred's body, urging him to run away, but _how could he do it? The curses that were now coming from outside would disfigure him!_

Eventually Harry lifted Fred, heading to the alcove behind one of the statues. His hands shaking violently and trying hard not to throw up, Percy helped him. At least Fred would be unharmed there.

_How was he going to tell his parents? How was he going to tell George?_

Percy glimpsed Rookwood, another Death Eater, on the other end of the corridor. Well, one thing was certain: _Fred was not going to be dead in vain._

He shouted at Rookwood and ran after him like his life depended on it.


	12. Teardrop

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Battle of Hogwarts comes to an end and Percy considers his relationship with his family.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The title is inspired by the song "Teardrop" by Massive Attack

**May 2nd, 1998**

Just a few hours before, Percy had been sitting in his office at the Ministry, writing his usual reports. _Was it really just a few hours? It felt like a century._

He felt like he had always been fighting, like he had never left his family.

Fred's death had changed his perspective. Before that, he had wanted to do his best, now he wanted to fight as many Death Eaters as possible.

_This attitude is dangerous. Emotion will make me lower my guard and I'll get myself killed he thought._

But it didn't happen. Maybe it would've happened the previous year, before the coup, but not now. He had become used to concealing his anger and his fear and he found out that he could be cold and cautious even if he was burning with fury.

He regretted not spotting Umbridge and Runcorn, he would've loved to jinx them. But probably they weren't Death Eaters.

And then he heard that voice again.

_"You fought valiantly. Lord Voldemort knows how to value bravery. Yet you have sustained heavy losses. If you continue to resist me, you will all die, one by one. I do not wish this to happen. Every drop of magical blood spilled is a loss and a waste. Lord Voldemort is merciful. I command my forces to retreat, immediately. You have one hour. Dispose of your dead with dignity, cure your injured"_

Then, He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named addressed Harry, urging him to turn himself in, stating that he had allowed other people to die for him.

Percy couldn't understand. Apparently, all the Dark Wizard cared about was Harry Potter, as if every other person fight him were irrelevant. Was it true? Was Harry Potter really the only one who could defeat him? He could see the strategy of He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named: playing with Harry's selflessness. It was a good strategy and Percy feared that it was going to work. He just hoped that the boy wouldn't turn himself in: if they allowed He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named to kill whom he wanted, then they had already lost to him.

But now they had an hour to dispose of their dead. _Now he had to inform his family and to retrieve Fred's body._

He walked to the Great Hall, at the same time hoping and fearing to find his parents, and he noticed his father kneeling next to a body.

Maybe Fred hadn't been the only casualty in the family, he thought with a lump in his throat, speeding up the pace. But no, the body belonged to Professor Lupin. And next to him… _lying dead next to him_ was Nymphadora Tonks, an Auror he remembered from the Ministry. She hadn't been much older than Percy himself and he wiped his eyes, swallowing hard.

His father was mourning and Percy couldn't bring himself to interrupt him.

"Dad" he said feebly.

His father turned and stood at once, studying his face.

"Who is dead?" he asked eventually, very quietly.

"Fred" said Percy in a whisper.

His father looked at him without moving a muscle and took a step forward. For a horrible moment, Percy feared that his father was going to punch him, but he found himself engulfed in a hug.

Stuttering and trying not to break down, Percy told him what had happened. His father listened without asking questions.

"I will tell your mother and George" he said eventually "Then I will pick up the… I will pick up Fred"

He looked composed, but Percy could feel the internal battle for control his father was fighting, a battle he knew all too well.

"I wish to come with you" he said firmly.

He waited there while his father informed the rest of the family. He couldn't bear the idea of seeing his mother's reaction.

His father came back after ten minutes, the front of his robe soaked with tears. Without a word, he gestured for Percy to lead the way.

They made their way through the debris until they found the alcove. His father kneeled beside Fred, stroking his hair and whispering something into his ear. Percy was trying so hard to fight the nausea that he didn't even feel the urge to cry.

_You haven't made a joke since that time when... when had he made a joke? He couldn't remember but apparently Fred did. So the twins had listened to him sometimes._

Together, they lifted Fred's body and carried it to the Great Hall, without magic.

His mother and George threw themselves at Fred's body, bursting into sobs. His mother seemed unable to lift her head from Fred's chest and George was hugging him tight, as if he was still alive. Ginny, Bill, Fleur and his father watched silently. Soon, they were joined by Ron, Harry and Hermione, all of them covered with dust. Ron went to stand next to him and

Percy put an arm around his shoulders, not knowing what else to do.

After a while, Ron disengaged himself from his grip to hug their mother and Percy went to sit in a corner and buried his face in his hands. They smelled of smoke, dust and blood.

Right now, he wouldn't have been able to fight the sobs. But, although his eyes were full with tears, the sobs didn't come.

_Now that he wasn't fighting, he felt empty. Fred was dead, maybe for nothing. Maybe Voldemort was going to win._

Percy noticed with mild surprise that he had thought Voldemort instead of the usual He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named. Well, to blazes. He was going to kill them whatever they called him.

He felt a hand rubbing his back and he wondered who it could be. He didn't raise his head but peeked through his fingers and recognized Bill's boots. Bill didn't speak and they stayed like that for quite a while, until Percy stood and joined the rest of his family again.

He didn't know how much time he spent kneeling next to Fred's body. Eventually, he heard Ron's voice, who seemed to come from a great distance.

"Where's Harry?"

Percy looked up. Ron and Hermione Granger stood next to each other, both of them equally frightened.

"He walked away not long ago.. I wonder whether..." said Hermione feebly.

"NO!" screamed Ginny, turning even paler.

Clearly, they weren't the only ones asking themselves where Harry was. All over the Great Hall people began to stand and look around because the hour they had been given was almost over.

The Hall went silent.

"The time is over. I don't see Harry anywhere" Shacklebolt said quietly "I think we should wait outside. The Death Eaters went to the forest and, whatever happened, they will likely come back here"

They moved slowly. Ron and Hermione had no idea about where Harry could be and this gave Percy a very bad feeling.

He was so taken by Fred's death that he hadn't even bothered to tell Harry " _don't turn yourself in_ ". But would Harry have listened to him, to any of them?

They scattered out on the grounds and waited silently.

After maybe ten minutes, Percy noticed that a crowd was approaching. In the first row, towering over the others, was Hagrid… _he was carrying something._

Then Percy saw Voldemort and, without even needing to look at Hagrid again, he knew that the groundkeeper was carrying the dead body of Harry Potter.

 _Why had Harry turned himself in?_ His sacrifice might save their lives now, but at what cost and to what end?

The people on his side started shouting, Percy could hear his mother bursting into sobs, McGonagall crying inhumanly, in a voice that just couldn't belong to her, Ginny screaming desperately.

And then Neville Longbottom _charged_ at Voldemort.

Percy was shocked. He remembered Neville from his school days - a clumsy boy who stuttered in front of teachers and apparently couldn't do anything right. Percy recalled that time when the boy had lost a list of the Gryffindor Tower's passwords while Sirius Black was around…

… now he was _unrecognizable_. He stood in front of Voldemort mocking him, challenging him.

Suddenly, they heard the loud cries of a crowd at a distance and a moment later they felt the ground quaking behind their feet.

Is that an earthquake? wondered Percy for a moment. But then he understood what was happening: reinforcement was coming.

Hundreds of people were running to the castle, likely coming from Hogsmeade or from the surrounding woods. Centaurs were charging and there was even a giant on their side, fighting against Voldemort's ones.

Percy couldn't see Harry's body anywhere. Hagrid had laid it on the ground, he dearly hoped that someone on their side had managed to pick him up before he was crushed by the people running in every direction.

They all backed into the castle, where even the house elves joined the battle. The portraits on the school walls and the ghosts were shouting words of encouragement, it looked like everyone wanted to fight. The Death Eaters looked outnumbered.

_Maybe it wasn't over, even if Harry had decided to sacrifice his life. And if they had to loose, it was better to die now than to live in a world lead by Voldemort._

This thought made him fight with even greater defiance. He avoided curses coming from every direction without bothering to think that each one of them could have killed him. He wanted to bring to the ground every single Death Eater in sight, he wanted it with such force that he didn't need to concentrate on the spells he was pronouncing.

And then he saw his mother fighting Bellatrix.

Percy couldn't explain why but he just knew that his mother was going to prevail. Bellatrix Lestrange was certainly more powerful, but his mother's eyes had a terrible light he had never seen before, a thirst for revenge against which Bellatrix had no power. He wasn't surprised in the slightest when Bellatrix fell backwards, dead.

He saw Voldemort cast a curse against his mother and rushed forwards to protect her, but before he could take a step somebody had sent a Shield Charm out of nowhere.

He looked around and there, removing his Invisibility Cloak, _was Harry Potter._

Percy knew that they had won. Again, he couldn't explain why, but the fact that Harry had turned himself in and had survived _had_ to mean something.

Harry and Voldemort started walking in a circle and Harry said many things, part of which Percy didn't understand. He said that Professor Snape had been loyal to Dumbledore all along because he had been in love with Harry's mother. He talked about a powerful wand which now belonged to him, while Voldemort was convinced that it was his.

The two raised their wands at the same time and for a moment Percy feared that Voldemort's killing curse would hit Harry. But then Voldemort's wand slipped out of his hand like it had a will of its own and flew to Harry, who grabbed it and pointed it back at Voldemort, who was hit and fell. He didn't move anymore.

Percy stood still, his eyes wide and his mouth hanging open, while the people screamed with joy, cheered and hugged each other.

_Was it really over? Just like that?_

He was brought back to the Earth by Oliver Wood giving him a rib-cracking hug and sobbing shamelessly. He felt unknown people patting his back and grabbing his shoulders and then Charlie hugging him and then Bill and George and Ron...

The sun had already risen and Percy hadn't slept in more than one day but he didn't feel tired. He helped to carry the victims' bodies out of the Great Hall and to dispose them in a small room nearby. Fred's expression was still smiling, _smiling at him._

Percy was about to go back to the Great Hall when a voice said softly "Hello".

He turned to see Audrey, covered with dust, with tousled hair and a torn jacket. She was smiling sadly.

"Hello! I am glad to see that you are well!" he said with relief.

"I was sure that I would find you here. I am sorry... for your loss" she whispered.

"Thank you"

Suddenly, Percy realized that his body was aching, that his head was heavy with tiredness, that he needed to eat but didn't want to, that his brother was gone forever, that he didn't have a job anymore.

 _I will think about that later. Not now_ he told himself firmly, concentrating again on Audrey.

"What about your family? Are they safe?" he asked.

"Yes. I couldn't speak to them since the coup but I kept an eye on them and they're fine" she answered with a smile.

"Thank you for the tip about the radio. I found it and it really helped"

_She had risked so much to let him know about the radio and what Fred had said before…_

"I'm glad it did, it helped me too. Now I'm leaving to see my family, I'll see you around at the Ministry" she said.

_At the Ministry? How could she possibly think that the Ministry would hire him again after the mess he had made?_

But Audrey clearly wanted to go see her family. It was not the right moment to talk about _his career_.

"Yes, of course" he answered while she waved and walked away.

When he finally went back to the Great Hall, the four tables were back in the usual places but nobody sat according to houses. Still, he had no trouble spotting his family's red hair in the crowd.

"Kingsley's been named Minister for Magic!" Ron greeted him happily.

"Not surprising" replied Percy, sitting next to him.

_When I left, he was an insecure fifteen years-old, now he's a war hero…_

Bill's face looked much better than the last time Percy had seen him, but he was still disfigured beyond repair. George had lost an ear, Percy hadn't noticed it before. Ginny's relationship with Harry had changed, it wasn't just a crush anymore, and he clearly reciprocated.

 _He had missed so many things._ A few hours before, he had felt like he had never left but now… _now he felt like a stranger among them._

"Let's go home" said his mother some time later, with a quivering voice, and they all stood.

Percy didn't know what he was supposed to do. Should he go back to his flat in London or go with them?

But he didn't need to make up his mind, because Ginny grabbed his arm and said "Come on".


	13. Father and Son

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Percy stays at the Burrow during the few days between the Battle and Fred's funeral.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The title is inspired by the song "Father and Son" by Yusuf Cat Stevens

**May 2nd - May 5th 1998**

When they arrived at the Burrow, Percy noticed that the house had been searched and looked like it had been deserted for a long time.

"Where have you been hiding?" he asked Ginny, who was still next to him.

"At Auntie Muriel's. Another gut reason to be grateful that the war is over" she said grumpily.

Percy half-smiled. He had always been Muriel's favourite nephew but she tended to become _unpleasant_ sometimes.

They placed Fred's body in the twins' bedroom and Bill performed a charm to prevent it from decaying.

They took turns for a quick shower and then his mother suggested, without conviction, that they should try to get some sleep. At first, George wanted to stay with Fred, but Charlie convinced him to sleep with him and Percy in Percy's room.

_He hadn't been there in almost three years._

The room hadn't changed. It still contained some books and other items he hadn't bothered to take with him upon leaving. He noticed with a lump in his throat that the bed was perfectly made, his mother had been waiting for him to come back all along.

His brothers insisted on leaving the bed to him ( _"you look like you can barely stand_ ", said Charlie) and went to fetch two camp beds in the attic.

Percy didn't expect to sleep but he dozed off immediately. It wasn't proper sleep and he kept waking up every now and then but that was exactly how he had slept every single night since the coup. If even he could sleep.

He was suddenly awoken by a strange sound. _He had never heard something like that…_

And then he understood: it was George sobbing.

He climbed slowly out of bed and kneeled next to George's camp bed.

He was unsure of what to do. Should he dare to touch his brother? _Maybe George held him responsible for Fred's death, maybe George hated him. He could make it worse… Charlie was approaching them, maybe his older brother should be the one doing this…_

But that sound coming from George's bed was unbearable.

Tentatively, he lifted his hand and stroked his brother's head.

Percy detested to cry - he hated losing control, especially in front of others. When other people cried, he never knew whether he should try to comfort them or pretend not to notice.

He just hoped he was doing the right thing.

He couldn't think of anything to say.

_What should I say, that he's going to feel better soon? That it's going to be alright? But it isn't._

He kept silently stroking George's head and listening to those sobs that sounded like the keening of a wounded animal. After some time, George sat up and wiped his eyes, taking long and deep breaths. Percy sat back to give him some space.

"I'm going downstairs" he said hoarsely "I wouldn't be able to sleep anyway"

Percy and Charlie exchanged a look and Percy saw his own thoughts reflected in Charlie's eyes.

_We shouldn't leave George alone right now._

They both hurried after him.

But their worry was apparently uncalled for, since the rest of the family was already downstairs. Only Ron and Harry were missing.

It was late in the afternoon and his mother, helped by Bill, was trying to put some food together.

"I think we'll have tea and cookies, I can manage an onion soup… the chickens are still at Muriel's and nobody has tended to the garden since Easter… " his mother was explaining to Fleur.

"Mum, I can make the soup if you wish" offered Percy, but she shook his head. She clearly wanted to keep busy and cooking was her favourite way of doing so.

Everybody was very quiet. Hermione was whispering charms, trying to repair the many damages the house had suffered. His father was trying to keep an eye on his mother and on George at the same time.

They heard footsteps and Ron walked in, rubbing his eyes.

"Where's Harry?" squeaked Hermione, agitation clear in her voice.

_It was hard to believe that the war was over…_

"Harry is in my bedroom, sleeping like a log" Ron answered with a small smile "First time he relaxes in years, I suppose"

"Yes, of course" she answered with a trembling laugh.

Half an hour later, they were all sitting in the living room, some with tea and cookies and some with onion soup. His mother was just wondering whether they should wake Harry when he emerged from the corridor.

He looked very unassuming, with an old Muggle T-shirt and tousled hair. It was hard to recognize him as the person who had defeated Voldemort a few hours before. He didn't behave like he had, either, and took the bowl of onion soup from his mother's hand with an almost shy smile.

Their meal was very quiet, still Percy was thankful that he hadn't gone back to London. He felt that he needed his family's physical presence right now.

After some time, his mother broke the silence.

"Excuse me, Harry, I know that you are tired and that you must be fed up with everything, but... I would… I would like to know what happened since the wedding… what Dumbledore had asked you to do. If you don't mind"

"Maybe another time, Molly?" said his father, looking uncertainly at Harry.

But Harry, after exchanging a look with Ron and Hermione, said "of course".

He finished swallowing his soup and leaned back on the sofa, thinking.

"Er... I suppose I should start from… the prophecy?"

He spoke for almost two hours, with Ron and Hermione occasionally filling the gaps.

He told them about the Prophecy, the Horcruxes, the mission with Dumbledore to retrieve one of them. And then the search for the remaining Horcruxes and for the Deathly Hallows with Ron and Hermione, which had lead them to break into the Ministry and Gringotts. Percy found out with delight that Harry was the one who had jinxed Umbridge months before.

Then came the difficult part. Percy thought that he would probably need to hear the same story a few more times before he could grasp every detail. Harry explained how he had watched Professor Snape's memories, thus realizing that Snape was not on Voldemort's side and that he, Harry, was supposed to die. He told them about his meeting with Voldemort and about how he had allowed Voldemort to curse him without resisting. And then that encounter with Dumbledore and the realization that Voldemort had killed his Horcrux in Harry but not Harry himself…

Harry spoke quietly, reporting the bravest and most selfless acts as if they were the most normal thing in the world. And Ron and Hermione, who had followed Harry and shared his dangers, Hermione who had even modified her parents' memories to allow them to forget her in case she didn't survive… They were barely eighteen and they had done all of that…

 _What was_ I _doing when I was their age_? thought Percy, grateful that it was getting dark and that nobody could notice his blush.

OOO

It was very late in the evening when they decided to go to bed again.

Percy noticed that his father was standing next to the door, apparently with no intention of moving from there, waiting for everybody to go upstairs.

Their eyes met for an instant and Percy understood that his father wished to speak to him. He stood as well but didn't move until everybody but he and his father had left.

He knew that this moment would come at some point. He knew it but he wasn't ready.

 _Could we not have this conversation in another ten years?_ he thought desperately.

But his father looked uneasy too. He opened his mouth and Percy thought that he was going to say something, but he just sighed.

"Look, Percy" his father said suddenly, his voice very quiet "I never meant to imply that you were unworthy of a promotion but merely…"

"Oh, but I was..." cut in Percy.

"... _merely_ " went on his father, not minding the interruption "that I could see ulterior motives in that promotion"

"I came to realize that there were ulterior motives" Percy said earnestly "but this doesn't mean…"

He stopped, unsure of how to continue.

_He didn't want to screw this up or to make excuses for his choices. But he needed to speak his mind._

"This doesn't mean that I would provide the information Fudge wanted. I never told him anything about the Order"

Percy feared that his father might be annoyed but he just nodded. "I know you didn't".

They were dancing around it. For as much as their disagreements about Dumbledore had put the tin hat on it, _the key issue was another_.

"No, I am not ambitious" his father said eventually.

Percy shifted uncomfortably on his feet and tried to speak but his father stopped him with a hand. " _No_. We are going to address this _now_. I am _not_ ambitious. And although I don't feel the need to be ambitious, I might have been unaware of how difficult it could be for you, included having second-hand and battered school items"

He hadn't expected to hear such an admission from his father and in all honesty he could've lived without it. It was terribly embarrassing.

"I wanted to address this now" his father went on "because I believe that avoiding this kind of conversations lead us to that row three years ago"

"Yes, I think so!" Percy replied eagerly

"I should have told you before that I found your attitude... _uh_..."

"...obnoxious?" suggested Percy.

His father smiled lightly "Well, I reckon a teenager is allowed to have an obnoxious attitude. But since you were the _sensible child_ we always failed to point it out. There were errors on both sides and we cannot change what happened. But thankfully we're together again and we can look forward. I just... if and when we disagree again, I don't want us to discuss it like we did three years ago" he concluded.

"Me neither" approved Percy.

There wasn't much left to say. His father squeezed his arm with a smile and walked upstairs, and Percy followed suit.

OOO

They decided to hold Fred's funeral on May 5th.

At first, Percy had decided to stay at the Burrow until the funeral and then go back to London but now he was changing his mind.

Truth be told, he liked to live alone and he didn't want to stay at the Burrow permanently. But after the funeral Bill and Fleur would go back to their home and Charlie would travel back to Romania. His mother and George were going to need support, although they both looked in control for the moment.

When he had approached the subject with his mother, she hadn't bothered to conceal her delight. _This was settled, for the moment._

And then he would need to look for a job. He still wanted to work at the Ministry, especially now that it didn't pursue a pureblood agenda anymore… but it would be shameless to apply after everything he had done. But he couldn't imagine working anywhere else!

It was not a very urgent matter, he still had some money in his vault at Gringotts. But he hated not having a plan, a structure, a goal.

_Well, this can wait until after the funeral he told himself._

On May 4th, he went to attend Nymphadora Tonks' and Professor Lupin's funeral together with his family. He hadn't known them very well - he didn't even know that they were married until the Battle- but he still felt like going.

The small cemetery was packed with people. In addition to the couple's family and Percy's one, there were many Hogwarts teachers and current or former students (all of which, Percy had no doubt, belonged to the Dumbledore's Army). There were other people he didn't know but he assumed were members of the Order of the Phoenix, and there was the new Minister of Magic, whose intense pain was radiating despite his usual calm attitude. Bill, who stood next to Percy, explained in a few whispers hat Shacklebolt had been very close to both Nymphadora and Professor Lupin.

At the end of the ceremony, the Minister approached his father and they spoke briefly together, too far for Bill and Percy to hear.

"What did Kingsley say to you?" Bill asked their father on the way home.

"He asked whether he could pay a visit tonight, said he has some things to discuss" answered their father.

 _He probably needs to speak to Harry_ thought Percy, hurrying after his family.


	14. Into Dust

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Percy receives an unexpected offer from Kingsley and attends Fred's funeral

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song's title is inspired by the song "Into Dust" by Ashtar Command.

**May 4th - May 5th 1998**

Percy sat in the living room with the rest of the family, waiting for Kingsley to arrive.

The day had been quite busy. After Lupin's and Nymphadora's funeral, his mother had decided to fetch the chickens at Muriel's and to start rebuilding the vegetable garden. She obviously needed to keep busy and also wanted the house to look like it was before.

_And she had a point_ , thought Percy. He was tired after spending hours under the sun in the garden but at the same time he felt soothed. After they had pulled weeds and planted vegetables, the garden had looked orderly and cosy. Percy didn't know how to express this with words, but the fact that a vegetable garden looked well-tended made him feel, more than anything else, that the war was over, that everything was normal again.

Suddenly they heard a noise at the doorstep and they all turned around to see the tall figure of Kingsley Shacklebolt approaching.

Percy knew that he had been a member of the Order but he ignored that he was on such friendly terms with his family. Everybody greeted him using his first name and he answered in the same way.

While the Minister shook hands with his siblings, complimenting them for how they had fought at Hogwarts, Percy wanted to disappear.

Shacklebolt had been there on that _dreadful_ evening when they had tried to arrest Dumbledore, he had seen Percy making a fool of himself. This was beyond embarrassing. When the Minister finally shook his hand as well, Percy struggled to look at him in the eye.

"Would you like to eat something, Kingsley? You have certainly been very busy" asked his mother.

"I wouldn't want to intrude.."

"Oh, please, don't even mention it!" she said, shaking her head

She handed him a plate of roasted potatoes and he thanked her profusely, explaining that this was the first decent meal since the day before.

"How are things going, Kingsley?" asked Bill.

"Well, we settled the most urgent matters. Released Muggle-Borns and other innocents from Azkaban. We jailed surviving Death Eaters -at least the ones who have not escaped- and conniving Ministry officers who are awaiting trial. That awful fountain with the writing _Magic is Might_ in the Ministry's Atrium was dismantled"

"What about Umbridge?" asked Ron

"In Azkaban, too. I bet she's going to spend quite some time there, but that will be decided at the trial. I don't wish to repeat the last time's errors - everybody will have a regular trial" the Minister explained.

"How did Umbridge react?" asked Harry.

"She tried to play along" he replied, and although his voice was still very calm, the anger in it was noticeable. "She probably assumed that she was going to make it again like it happened with Rufus Scrimgeour. It was a wrong assumption"

"When are the trials going to start? If Draco Malfoy will be tried, I should probably testify… " asked Harry again.

"The provisional date is May 18th. Many people who should testify are still abroad or recovering from Azkaban at the moment"

Harry nodded.

"There is a matter I would like to discuss with you and I don't wish to do it tomorrow" said Shacklebolt. "Many former Ministry officers are coming back from hiding. I am trying to find out whether they wish to resume their positions now that the war is over" he paused and looked at his father.

"Would you like to resume your job, Arthur?"

"Certainly" my father answered immediately.

"Of course you are not expected to be back for another week, given the situation" added the Minister "we do need anti-counterfeit units but now the most urgent matters are chasing the missing Death Eaters and ensuring that people can come back from hiding. It's great to know what we'll have you back in a while"

"I presume that my current department will be dismantled now" said his father.

"Not so soon. There are still many Dark objects and counterfeit items around and we need to take care of that. Then we will decide together. I believe that Scrimgeour's decision to have an anti-counterfeit unit instead of an office for Muggle artefacts only was not wrong" replied the Minister.

His father nodded. "Yes, it is probably more efficient this way".

"And _you_ , Percy" Shacklebolt went on, turning to him.

Percy forced himself to look at him. _He didn't want to be sacked in front of his family._

"If you wish to resume your position, I'm afraid I will need you sooner, at the end of this week"

Percy looked at him with wide eyes.

The Minister probably misinterpreted his expression because he added apologetically: "I know that it's soon and I am sorry. Under normal circumstances, I would not ask that of you right now. But we have to dismantle the Death Eaters' Ministry and many of the former employees have fled abroad or have been just released from Azkaban. I don't have a new Senior Undersecretary too... there is such a shortage of trustworthy staff that I could not appoint a new one yet"

"I understand the situation" Percy said slowly, still bewildered. He had never _dreamed_ that Shacklebolt would want him back as a Junior Assistant, not even for a second.

Looking around, he interctepted his father's encouraging gaze.

"I will be there at the end of the week, Minister. Thank you" he replied, trying to hide his emotion.

"It's _Kingsley_ " he answered with a small smile "otherwise I would have called you _Mr. Weasley_ "

Percy _dearly wanted_ to point out that calling the Minister by first name would be inappropriate but he supposed that it would sound uptight. With some difficulty, he forced himself to say "very well".

But something didn't add up.

"If both Junior and Senior Undersecretary are absent... who is doing their job now?" he asked after a moment.

"Your secretary showed up yesterday in the morning. She offered her help, now that being Muggle-born is not a crime anymore" the Minister explained.

Percy was speechless. _Audrey couldn't do all of that work by herself!_

"But... she's an intern! The workload is immense and she was fighting at Hogwarts too, she is probably exhausted. Now I'm feeling really… If I had knew that you needed support I would have…"

"She warned me that you would say something like that" Kingsley said with another soft smile "She wants you to know that she has jinxed your desk to prevent you from working until Thursday. Don't curse the messenger" he added.

Percy looked at him with wide eyes. _Was he serious?_

"Miss Swinton is _very_ thoughtful and accommodating" he said "Still, I'm afraid I am taking advantage of her kindness"

"You don't need to worry. Everything is under control" said Kingsley, his voice low and soothing "but in a few days people will start coming back from exile, they will need to resume their jobs, inquiries will start. Next week, we will have much more to do than we have now. Besides, Miss Swinton is very willing to help you after what happened on her last work day"

Percy blushed slightly. _There was no need…_

"What happened on her last work day?" asked Ginny.

"Nothing" said Percy firmly.

"I happen to know a different story where you helped her escape before Umbridge could question her" said Kingsley just as firmly.

"She doesn't need to feel indebted. It was the very least I could do, she was treated unfairly" he mumbled, not knowing where to look. He knew that his face was very red and that everyone was looking at him.

"I don't think this is about feeling indebted but rather about helping you in a difficult time as you have done with her" reasoned the Minister.

Percy nodded: "Very well. Thank you. And would you be so kind to thank Miss Swinton for me?"

"Certainly" said Kingsley, standing "I will see all of you tomorrow"

Percy took the opportunity to stand as well and accompany him to the door. He couldn't tell why, but the fact that his family now knew about Audrey made him feel uneasy.

"Your choice to keep me as Junior Assistant might raise some… disappointment" he said casually before opening the front door.

"I don't see why it should" replied Kingsley "You fought at Hogwarts, you helped several Muggle-Borns escape. Yes, I know there were several of them" he added, looking earnestly at him. "And you can do your job. There are many good people who just realized too late what was going on. I will not sack people just because they once made an error of judgment"

"Thank you" said Percy, glad that the dim light was concealing his moist eyes.

His family was still silent when he came back to the living room. He tried to avoid everybody's eyes but he met George's gaze for a split second. There was a fondness he had never seen.

"Percy?" asked Ron's voice suddenly.

"Yes?"

" _Your secretary bosses you around_. I need time to digest this information"

Everybody snorted. Percy scowled at him but then he smiled ruefully.

"Me too" he conceded.

OOO

The funeral was going to take place in the morning.

George's attitude was not was he had been expecting, Percy thought.

He was clearly devastated. He had trouble sleeping and obviously wasn't his usual playful and jolly self. But, all things considered, he was reacting very quietly. After that outburst a few hours after Fred's death, he hadn't really broken down anymore. Was he really in control or was he going to explode sooner or later?

"I'm surprised at the way George is reacting" he said tentatively to Bill while they cleaned up the kitchen after breakfast.

"Me too. I don't know whether I should be worried or not" replied Bill, nodding knowingly.

"You shouldn't" said a voice coming from the door. They turned to see George standing there, already clad in a mourning dress.

He stepped in slowly and leaned against the sideboard.

"We discussed it openly, Freddie and I, before we joined the Order. We admitted that one of us could die during the war and we discussed what the other would do in case it happened. And we promised to each other that we would grieve but also move on if the other died. He promised it to me and I to him"

Percy didn't know how to answer to this. _His twin brothers had apparently been much more serious than he believed them to be._

"This doesn't mean that it's a picnic" George went on "but I know what he would want me to do, I know it beyond doubt because he told me"

"Alright" said Bill softly. He too, noticed Percy, didn't trust his voice.

OOO

When they reached Ottery St. Catchpole's small cemetery, a lot of people had already arrived. There were not only the members of the Order and of Hogwarts' staff that Percy had seen the previous day, but many Hogwarts' students and almost all of the twins' old classmates.

Kingsley was already there and next to him stood Audrey, clutching an handkerchief. Their eyes met for a moment and she regarded him affectionately. Had he been closer to her, she would have probably hugged him.

Percy felt uneasy. He knew that the twins had been very popular both at Hogwarts and after they had left. It was obvious that so many people wanted to attend but he didn't feel comfortable with showing his pain to everyone. Yes, there was nothing wrong in grieving for his brother, _there was nothing to be ashamed of._

Yet he couldn't bring himself to do it.

The celebrant spoke words Percy didn't listen to, the coffin was lowered into the ground. Percy could hear his mother's sobs, muffled against his father's chest. He could hear family and friends weeping more or less silently. _He couldn't_. He probably looked heartless but he just couldn't.

After the funeral, many people wanted to pay their respects. Oliver Wood, Fred's old Quidditch teammates, many Gryffindors. Audrey was the last one.

"I am sorry" she whispered simply. She had cried more than he had and her eyes were still puffy.

"Thank you. For coming and for everything else"

"Never mind" she said seriously "See you on Thursday"

"See you on Thursday" he echoed her.


	15. Analyse

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Percy starts working for Kingsley Shacklebolt and slowly goes back to his apartment in London, but he begins to feel overwhelmed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The title is inspired by the song "Analyse" by the Cranberries

**May 1998**

Percy felt quite nervous when he stepped in the fireplace on Thursday morning.

This wasn't just the nervousness of having a new boss, oh no. The point was rather how the other people working at the Ministry would treat him now.

He could remember the hateful looks and the silent treatment he had received after standing for Fudge years before. During Thicknesse's government, people had kept to themselves but what was going to happen now? Was he going to be an outcast? Or would people take into account the fact that he wasn't the same person anymore?

When he stepped out of a fireplace in the Ministry's Atrium, he was welcomed by the old, familiar hum of dozens of people talking. It was somewhat comforting, during the last months the Atrium had been pretty silent even when it was packed with people. The employees laughed, greeted each other and chatted like they had done every morning before the coup.

Percy went straight to the lift, where several people were already standing. The doors were about to close when Kingsley stepped in, greeting everybody with a smile.

_Oh, no, he's already here. I should've arrived earlier. Now I won't have time for the schedule. Great way to start with your new boss, Percy._

"Let's see about today's schedule, shall we?" said Kingsley while they walked into Percy's office. Audrey was already there and she stood with a smile.

_Great. Even my secretary is already here. What is he going to think now? How very disappointing!_

"Good morning! I wasn't expecting you so early!" said Audrey.

Now that she didn't have to worry about Death Eaters and Snatchers anymore, she was glowing and it looked like nothing could please her more than to be there with them.

"Yes. I didn't want to show up later than Percy" said Kingsley.

"Kingsley, the Norwegian Minister for Magic has sent an urgent-looking owl. I left it on your desk" she added

Was he serious? He always looked so earnest no matter what he was saying, it was so difficult to tell… 

They took care of the schedule, then Kingsley went to his office.

"There is a matter I would like to address before we start working" said Percy to Audrey. "The Minister is apparently on first name with the staff. If you call the Minister by his first name, it would be odd to call me by surname. If it doesn't bother you, we should maybe switch to first names as well"

"I thought we were already past surnames!" she replied, raising an eyebrow.

_Were they? Oh, well…_

Percy couldn't imagine how Audrey had managed to do all of that work by herself. Owls and internal notes from various departments kept arriving non-stop and they barely had time to eat.

"I don't even dare to ask how much overtime you've done during the last days" he told her late in the afternoon.

"Oh, not so much actually. The workload has increased since yesterday" she replied lightly.

Percy didn't know whether he should believe her or not.

OOO

 _Why do I have to mull over every single thing?_ thought Percy that evening, while getting ready for bed.

He had tried to do his very best at work. But there was so much to do that he hoped he hadn't forgotten anything important.

_Get a grip, Percy. You are efficient and organised, that's why Kingsley hired you._

Or had Kingsley hired him just because he was close to his family? What if the Minister got disappointed with him?

His family had waited on him for dinner, although he had come back quite late. His mother told him that it was no trouble at all.

 _His siblings were so nice to him right now. How long would the_ honeymoon _last?_

Bill and Fleur had left after the funeral and Charlie had travelled back to Romania on that very day. Hermione had left to Australia, planning on finding her parents.

At the moment, Percy was the oldest sibling at home and he wasn't sure about how he felt about that. Sometimes he wished that Bill and Charlie could've stayed a little longer, their presence certainly provided more security than his one.

He felt so out of place.

He hadn't apologised to Harry yet. He knew that he should do it but he never seemed to find the right moment. He hadn't spoken to George about his future: was he going to open the shop again? Was he going back to his flat in Diagon Alley without Fred? He had no idea about how committed Ron and Hermione or Harry and Ginny were. He didn't know whether he was supposed to ask or to wait until someone informed him. Asking sounded intrusive, not asking sounded indifferent.

Years before he would have known what he should do. _Yes, and it would have been the wrong thing._

 _Stop making a fuss over nothing_ , Percy he told himself, walking to his bedroom.

The room was unsurprisingly empty. He had been sharing the bedroom with George and Charlie even after the funeral, they didn't feel like leaving George alone in the night. But now that Charlie had left, George was sleeping in his own room again. He wouldn't want to keep sharing a room with Percy, of all people.

Tomorrow I'll bring the camp beds back in the attic, thought Percy grabbing a random book. It was _Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them_.

Great. Scamander could really write well, just what he needed to stop dwelling.

He had barely read a couple of pages when a voice startled him.

"Ah, you're still awake!"

George stood in the doorframe, wearing his pyjamas.

"You looked so fed up tonight that I thought you were already sleeping" went on George, walking to his camp bed.

_So he didn't wish to sleep alone yet._

"Go on reading if you wish… the light doesn't bother me" came George's voice from under the covers.

"Just another page. My eyes are closing" said Percy slowly.

_Should he say something more? Was George expecting some night talk or some questions? Was he going to look insensitive?_

_Dwelling again… might as well close the book, Percy!_

OOO

The following days were as busy as the first one. Thankfully, the Minister had appointed a new Senior Undersecretary: Lavinia Marleigh from Magical Law Enforcement, a Muggle-Born who had just returned from hiding.

Kingsley's schedule was impossibly full. There were meetings to re-organise the main Ministry departments and erase Thicknesse's ones, Wizengamot sessions to abolish laws against Muggle-Borns, the search for the fugitive Death Eaters… and still, Kingsley's calm attitude didn't waver. One step after another, he managed to do everything.

Percy managed to do everything too, but he had a feeling that Kingsley didn't dwell continuously like he did.

The trials were approaching. Several Death Eaters, including the Malfoys and Yaxley, were going to be tried, as well as former Ministry officers like Umbridge and Runcorn.

"What about Thicknesse?" asked Percy, noticing that his name was not in the trial's calendar.

"There will be a preliminary inquiry on officers like him and Dawlish, who might have been under the Imperius Curse. They will be tried in a second moment, if necessary"

Kingsley had stated that he didn't want to repeat the previous time's errors and Percy was beginning to see what he meant: the new Minister didn't share Mr. Crouch _zero tolerance_ attitude.

Mr. Crouch had wanted so badly to send Dark Wizards to Azkaban that he had sometimes failed to ascertain their guilt. Sirius Black had been sent to Azkaban without a trial because according to Mr. Crouch he had been caught in the act. But it had turned out to be a tragic mistake. He had equated multiple murderer Death Eaters and ill-advised boys who didn't know what they were doing. And that because he wanted to be perceived as inflexible and rigorous. Scrimgeour had done something similar with Stan Shunpike.

Percy had once approved of that unforgiving attitude. To him, it had been the proof that Mr. Crouch held fast to his principles.

Just another of his _radical opinions_. Another _self-righteous, moronic, childish_ opinion.

Years before, he had been shocked upon finding out what Mr. Crouch's son had done. Father and son couldn't have been more different, he had thought.

 _On the contrary_. Mr. Crouch and Barty Crouch Jr. had been two sides of a Galleon. Two sides of the same _fanatic, merciless_ Galleon.

Percy was ashamed to admit that even to himself, but sometimes in the past he had wished to be Mr. Crouch's son. _Thank Goodness he wasn't!_

Kingsley's approach was different. Nobody was guilty until proven guilty. Nobody would be sent to Azkaban just to satiate someone's hunger for revenge or to boost someone's reputation. The Minister kept explaining this every time he was asked.

Well, he could afford it. It was well-known that Kingsley had lead the Resistance against Voldemort after Dumbledore's death. Nobody could accuse him of conniving with the Death Eaters. He was listened to, and not just because he was the Minister.

Percy was notified that he and Audrey had to testify at Dawlish and Thicknesse's hearing on May 20th and at Umbridge's trial on the May 21st.

_He had been working with Thicknesse, Umbridge and Yaxley for one year and he was the only one of them who wasn't facing an inquiry or a trial. It was almost too good to be true._

Maybe the commission which was now investigating knew that he had been fighting at Hogwarts. Maybe they knew that he had helped some people escape, just like Kingsley had known.

He wasn't looking forward to testifying. Until now, he had been mostly dealing with paperwork, he hadn't met so many Ministry employees. But the trials would be a different story, especially Umbridge's one. He was going to meet lots of people. This thought kept him up in the night and he couldn't even turn over too much in bed because otherwise he would wake up George...

OOO

"I think it's time for me to sleep alone again" told him George one evening.

It was a week after Percy had started working again.

"Are you sure?" asked Percy.

"Not sure that it'll work but sure that I should try. I'm very grateful for your support, anyway"

Percy hadn't _noticed_ that he was _supporting_ George. Unless sleeping in the same room qualified as support.

_Well, at least he was doing something right._

After George started sleeping in his own room again, Percy began to think about going back to London.

He cautiously approached the topic with his mother, not knowing how she would react.

"Of course you want to go back to your own place" she said understandingly "but you must visit us in the weekend. And we should visit too, we never have. Just tell me when you wish to go and I'll pack you some cookies and mince pie…"

"Mum, it's very thoughtful but I _can_ cook"

"I know you can cook, and very well too, I must add" she answered "I didn't even know you cooked"

 _Was his mother really praising his cooking skills?_ Yes, he had once decided to learn how to cook, and whenever he wanted to learn something he became proficient. But his mother praising him… 

"Well, I had to learn after I left home. I was used to delicious meals and after three days on salads…"

She smiled, although the smile didn't quite reach her eyes.

"Still, you are working very late these days, Percy. You won't have the time. Some cookies and mince pie won't hurt"

 _Some cookies had been an understatement_ , thought Percy some days later, placing an enormous box of cookies on his kitchenette's table.

It felt almost unreal to be there again. Everything had changed since his last night at home.

_The sleepless nights were the only constant._

Tomorrow was May 20th, Thicknesse and Dawlish's inquiry. And Umbridge on 21st. _Great. Ready to be regarded like a smudge of dirt, Percy?_

He hadn't found the guts to apologise to Harry. He hadn't asked about him and Ginny or about Ron and Hermione. _Awesome. They were going to think that he didn't care._

He hadn't found the guts to visit Fred's grave again after the funeral. _Brilliant. Congratulations, Percy, you are really brave._

Well, at least Kingsley wasn't complaining about him. _Right_. Percy's own secretary had managed without him for several days. _Looks like I'm unreplaceable…_

And Fred had told him to ask her out, he thought with a snort. Yes, that would be a _terrific idea_ : a pullback on top of everything else. _Good way to boost his self-esteem._

_Get a grip. You haven't broken down before, you won't break up now. It doesn't help to become emotional. Just get a grip and sleep._


	16. Time Has Told Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Percy testifies at Dawlish's inquiry and at Umbridge's trial.  
> Then he doesn't flirt with Audrey. Not at all. Or does he?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The title is inspired by the song "Time Has Told Me" by Nick Drake.
> 
> "And time will tell you  
> to stay by my side  
> to keep on trying  
> 'til there's no more to hide"
> 
> Thanks to everyone who left me kudos or commented or is reading my story. I really appreciate it!

**May 1998 - June 1998**

_He dearly hoped that Dawlish would be cleared, thought Percy that evening, lying in his bed._

A few hours before, he and Audrey had testified at Dawlish's inquiry.

Percy had expected to find more people listening but, since this was only an inquiry and not a trial, the conversation was classified. There were the two of them, John Dawlish and then a commission formed by Eustace Macmillan, Alban Twycross and Eleanor Jones, either from Magical Law Enforcement or from the Auror Office.

John Dawlish looked like he was going through Hell.

Previously, he had been ever so slightly overweight, now he looked like he had lost ten pounds in a few weeks. When he turned to greet them, his eyes were shallow.

The questioning was quite relaxed. The commission asked whether they knew Dawlish well, whether they had noticed a change in his behaviour and what for one. Dawlish was clearly listening to their answers but he never lifted his gaze from the table.

"Poor fellow. It must've been terrible to find out what he did while he wasn't himself" said Audrey sadly while they walked back to their office.

"He looks like he's having a mental breakdown" conceded Percy "I really hope that he won't be tried"

"I think not. I wouldn't be so sure about Thicknesse, however"

They had testified at Thicknesse's investigation as well that day, but they had the impression that the commission was colder to the former Minister than it had been to Dawlish.

"Well, they have to face a difficult decision with Thicknesse. I think the commission knows that he was Imperiused and had no chance to behave otherwise. But we're still talking about a Minister for Magic. I reckon that he'll be tried in order to be cleared openly and without doubt" said Percy.

Some days later, his prediction turned out to be right. Dawlish was cleared without further investigation and Thicknesse was committed to stand trial, although it looked like a mere formality.

Dawlish got back his job at the Ministry but he decided not to work for the Auror Office for the moment.

Understandable, thought Percy. He wondered whether the people who had been Imperiused would ever be the same afterwards.

_No wonder Kingsley had presented a bill to equate Imperius victims with the other torture victims._

OOO

Umbridge's trial was another story.

When he and Audrey arrived, the courtroom was already packed with people. Thankfully they had two seats in the witness boxes.

Percy looked around. Harry, Ron and Hermione were all there - she had come back from Australia with her parents. There were several former Hogwarts students, including George and Lee Jordan, as well as Professor McGonagall and other Hogwarts staff. There were many other people - probably Muggle-Borns Umbridge had tried to send to Azkaban.

And then there was the public. Percy recognised many Muggle-Borns who had managed to escape, like Sylvia Mills, Dean Thomas and his ex-girlfriend, Penelope Clearwater.

There was an awful silence when Umbridge was escorted into the courtroom. For an instant, Percy dreaded that the public would lynch her.

But nothing happened and she sat in front of the jury. She tried to look self-confident but she didn't quite manage it now that she wasn't powerful anymore.

When he was called as a witness, Percy stood reluctantly. Yes, he was ready to do his duty, no questions there. But now everybody was going to look at him, to listen to him. He could imagine what many of them were thinking: " _Oh, that moron who told the press how great Umbridge was?"_

_Just focus on the jury like there weren't anybody else, he told himself._

Yes, easier said than done.

Erasmus Ogden, one of the judges, looked intently at him from over his spectacles and Percy was oddly reminded of Dumbledore. Next to him, a grey-haired witch whose name he didn't know took notes. _He should focus on them. Just focus on them and pretend not to see the public._

The jury asked him very few questions but all of them required long answers. Percy talked at length about Umbridge's statements concerning Muggle-Borns, her decision to fire Audrey before her hearing and without reason, her claims that she was going to _send another bunch of Muggle-Borns to Azkaban_ and that M _udbloods should be kissed by the Dementors without a trial_. Thanks to his good memory, he could convey Umbridge's statements almost word for word.

He could hear part of the public humming in shock while he walked back to the witness box. With the corner of his eye, he could see Penny cover her mouth with her hand.

After him, Audrey gave her statement. And then it was Harry's turn.

He answered the questions very quietly, then walked along the jury's table to show the scar saying " _I must not tell lies_ " on his hand. Not once he turned his head to look at Umbridge.

His calm was probably just apparent because, as soon as Harry sat back in the witness box, Ron whispered to him " _Congrats, mate, you haven't cursed her_ ".

Percy wasn't really surprised at Harry's attitude. It was evident that he fully shared Kingsley's _no bloodlust_ stance. His behaviour at the Malfoy's trial, a few days before, had ben clearer than a press conference. Harry had obviously wanted to spare Azkaban to Draco and Narcissa Malfoy - and he had succeeded.

It was already late in the afternoon and the court was adjourned. Percy walked out of the courtroom with Audrey at his side, trying to avoid everybody's eyes.

OOO

"Things are improving. Now we have time for a normal lunch break" Audrey mused a few weeks later.

It was true. Now that the trials were over and that many Ministry employees were back from hiding, things were almost back to normal.

"It won't last long, at least for me. In another month you'll be gone and I'll have to train yet another secretary. _Poor me!_ " replied Percy with a small smile.

Audrey was going to join Experimental Charms in the middle of July. Her internship was actually already over, but in the few weeks after the Battle Percy would not have had the time to train a new secretary, so she had stayed a little longer.

"I didn't know that training me was such an ordeal for you" she jibed.

"I would sign on right now for another secretary like yourself" said Percy seriously "but one cannot always be lucky"

For once, neither Kingsley nor Lavinia had come to lunch with them and they were unusually alone.

"Thank you" replied Audrey, blushing slightly.

"It's the truth, you're a very good secretary. But I know that working in Experimental Charms is your dream job…"

"Well... my dream job would be another, actually…" she confessed, still blushing slightly.

Percy raised his eyebrows.

"Oh? But you told me that you love Charms"

"Yes, I do. That's why I would like to… well… teach Charms" she admitted, shooting him a sideways glance.

_Was she expecting him to laugh or what?_

"Really? That's great! So you would like to apply when Professor Flitwick retires?"

"Yes. But I don't expecting to happen for another twenty years to say the least, so... I'll be working in Experimental Charms for quite a while, hopefully"

"I've never met anybody who wanted to teach at Hogwarts" mused Percy "I must admit that I considered this possibility for a very short while when I was at school - I enjoyed tutoring students. But actually I prefer to train adults"

"Speaking of school" said Audrey "McGonagall has been confirmed as Hogwarts' Headmistress, have you heard?"

"Ah, yes!" answered Percy with a pleased smile "Well, no surprises there"

"Oh, _no_!" she replied, raising her eyebrows comically "now you Gryffindors are going to boast even more than usual!" she smiled wickedly.

"Am I to understand that you're _insulting my house_ , Miss Swinton?" he smiled back.

" _Me_? I wouldn't _dream_ of it!"

Percy raised his eyebrows, knowing that it made him look haughty.

"I won't grace that with an answer. I'm not so naive as to engage in a battle of wits with a Ravenclaw. That is something you can win at, _contrary to Quidditch!_ "

Audrey gasped in outrage.

" _Ouch_! That is not very _gallant_ , Mr. Weasley. I ought to be mad at you, but the point is…" she started giggling "...that you were actually joking! I've never heard you joke since… forget that, I've never heard you joke"

_That hit like a Petrifying Charm._

The impish smile disappeared instantly from her face when she noticed Percy's expression.

"What's going on?" she asked, confused.

"Nothing at all" said Percy, trying to keep his voice steady "Just... We'd better go, our lunch break is almost over"

He stood without waiting for her reply but she followed suit.

"Did I say something wrong? You looked like I had slapped you. I didn't mean to be offensive"

"There's nothing wrong, you weren't offensive" he said curtly.

_Just like Fred. Same words. Same smile._

_He hadn't visited his grave anymore sine the funeral. He had tried many times but he couldn't gather the strength to face that grave._

_George visited Fred's grave very often, he even talked to it. Maybe he should just accompany George one day…_

_No. He couldn't do it with George. He just couldn't._

He was very silent during the afternoon. Sometimes he felt Audrey's gaze on him and he purposefully didn't lift his eyes.

She stood from her desk and started gathering her things. _Good. In a few minutes he was going to be alone._

He could see her walk to his desk and stand in front of it.

"Percy" she called softly.

He looked up at her and he knew that he was doomed. Her expression said _now we are going to discuss this_.

"I don't want to hurt people, even without meaning to. If I have upset you with something I've said, I would like to know it" she said softly.

He stood and started pacing. He didn't want to meet her eyes.

"Very well. When my brother Fred died… I was by his side. I was duelling with Thicknesse and I told him that I was resigning. And Fred... " Percy took a deep breath "Fred turned to me with a smile and told me _you're actually joking! I've never heard you joke since that time when we_... and then… " other deep breath "then the wall behind us exploded and he was hit and... it was the last thing he said to me. So when you said almost the same words I just... it was unexpected and it hit hard"

His eyes were wet and he kept pacing.

"I'm sorry. I didn't know that" she whispered.

"Of course you didn't. Only my family does" he fell silent and Audrey stayed silent as well.

Once his eyes were dry again, he turned to her, forcing himself to smile.

"But it's not that you said something hurtful. It was just an emotional reaction. I am fine"

She hesitated for a moment, then said "You don't look fine"

Percy started pacing again.

"I was thinking that I haven't visited his grave since the funeral. He was the first one who welcomed me back into the family that evening, we had a real conversation - we had never talked that much before - and then he... every time I try to go to the cemetery, I give up"

"Have you tried to go with someone?" she asked quietly.

He shook his head. "No. I don't wish to go with my siblings, they are… too involved"

"A friend?"

"Like whom?" he snorted. Sure, Oliver Wood would accompany him if he asked but it just... he had already broken down once in front of Oliver, when Ginny had been brought into the Chamber of Secrets. He had sent an owl to his parents and then he had barely made it to his dorm. It had been the last time he had cried in front of someone else. Oliver had even pretended not to notice, bless him. _But he just hated to be seen like that, he just..._

"I could come with you, if you wish" said Audrey.

He knew that she wasn't just playing nice. She meant it.

"I... it is very kind of you to ask. I will think about it if I don't manage to go alone"

She smiled faintly but didn't move.

"Well, I... probably I should go, too"

He gathered his things and followed her to the Atrium.

That night, lying in bed, he thought back about that conversation during the lunch break.

_Had they been flirting?_

_Of course not_ , he snorted. _He didn't flirt with his secretary, it wouldn't be appropriate. They had just been joking._

Too bad that she was going to leave soon.

She was really kind, and not just now. She was always kind, considerate, careful not to hurt his feelings. _Which were, despite his continuous effort to appear in control, quite easy to hurt._

 _Maybe_ Fred had been right, _maybe_ he should ask her out. In a few weeks she wouldn't be his secretary anymore and then _maybe_ he could…

… and then _maybe_ he could _quit being ridiculous_ , he told himself. _At the moment he could barely look after himself, what could he offer to a kind, bright and beautiful young woman? She would laugh in his face, point._


	17. Sometimes You Can't Make It On Your Own

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Percy visits Fred's grave with Audrey and breaks down

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The title is inspired by the song "Sometimes you can't make it on your own" by U2.  
> The two black and white posters I mention in the chapter refer to World War II. The other poster refers to the football team Manchester Utd

**July 1998**

_He was going to miss her._

It was Audrey's last day of work as his secretary and he was going to miss her, and not only because she was great at her job. No, he would miss her kindness, her helpfulness, the way she joked with him without ever saying something hurtful.

_I wonder whether she will miss me, too._

He glanced over at her desk. She was finishing a report, her blond hair tied back in a bun. Like many Ravenclaws, she liked to wear blue clothes. That light blue shirt suited her so well…

Audrey lifted her gaze and looked at him, puzzled.

_Great, Percy. She caught you staring at her._

"Yes?" she asked.

"Nothing. I was just thinking" he answered, looking down at the papers on his desk.

_Stop blushing. Stop. Blushing._

The door opened and Kingsley walked in. "Are you free tomorrow evening around 6 p.m.? I would like to invite the two of you and Lavinia for a drink at the Leaky Cauldron to say goodbye to Audrey"

"That's nice, thank you!" replied Audrey with a cheerful smile.

"I am free. I will be there, thank you" said Percy.

He knew that his face was still very red and felt quite self-conscious. Kingsley shot him a quizzical look but didn't ask any questions and walked back to his office.

_Maybe Fred had been right about Audrey._

_Oh, no. No. No._ He should not think about Fred while he was at work.

He still hadn't gathered the strength to visit his grave.

_Stop thinking about Fred._

Not a single time since the funeral. He was probably the only one in his family. One month before, Audrey had volunteered to accompany him. He had said he would think about it.

_Ok, then ask her to do it! Then you won't be able to back off, you coward!_

He had to ask before he had the time to think about it.

"Audrey?" he called. She looked up at him.

"Once you said that you could come with me on… on Fred's grave" he said quietly.

"Yes" she answered.

"Would you please accompany me tomorrow?" he asked.

Yes, tomorrow. He would only have one single night to dwell about it.

"Certainly" she said seriously.

That night, in bed, Percy wondered whether it had been a good idea. What if he broke down in front of her?

_Well. At least he would be able to face his brother's grave, something he should have done months before._

OOO

Audrey was already waiting for him when he apparated in Ottery St. Catchpole's small cemetery. He took a deep breath and walked straight to the grave. He knew that, if he stopped, he would never be able to go on.

Audrey stopped discretely a couple of steps behind him and Percy went to stand in front of the grave.

It was covered with flowers and small item from Weasley's Wizard Wheezes.

Summoning all his strength, he looked up at Fred's picture.

The picture shot him a surprised smile and Percy almost expected to hear him say _"lo an behold, better late than never!"_

He regarded the picture for a long time, wishing that he could say something and that Fred could understand. But he couldn't open his mouth.

He felt both devastated and glad to be here. Now that he had overcome his fear, he felt that he would be able to come back again, even alone.

_Why had he delayed this visit for so long?_

_Was it because he couldn't accept that Fred was dead?_

_No._

_It was because of that conversation, that short conversation between the two of them during the battle. When he had realised... he had realised..._

He glanced behind his shoulder: Audrey hadn't moved. For some reason he wished that she could come closer.

She seemed to perceive his thoughts, because a moment later she was standing next to him.

"I realised something just before he..." whispered Percy. "We were talking and I realised that we could have gotten along much better if only… if only we had talked more to each other and known each other. And I thought… that after the battle we would have time to mend it. I just wished that I had realised it before" he concluded miserably.

Audrey was now squeezing his arm.

This admission had consumed every last bit of his strength. It was just a matter of time before he broke down, he knew it.

"We... we can go" he said hoarsely, and they slowly walked out of the cemetery.

_Now pull yourself together and bid her goodbye before you loose it._

But before he could open his mouth, she outstretched her hand and said "come".

"Wh... where?" he asked, taken aback.

"To my place. You shouldn't be alone in such a state" she explained.

 _He wanted to say no. He wanted to say that he was_ much obliged _and that he would see her tonight at the Leaky Cauldron with Kingsley and Lavinia._

But he couldn't stand being alone right now. He couldn't stand being alone with the thoughts that taunted him every single night.

He took her hand and let her Apparate them both.

OOO

A moment later, Percy found himself in a small and cosy living room. Outside it was raining heavily.  
"We are in Castlemartin, in Wales. Make yourself comfortable, I'll make some tea" she said quietly. She was still holding his hand and she gave it a squeeze before dropping it and disappearing in the kitchen.

_You can't loose it now. Focus on the furniture, the pictures, the books._

Audrey had a poster of the Holyhead Harpies and a poster of a Muggle sports team, portraying eleven men with red shirts. Maybe a football team, it was a popular sport in Britain if he remembered correctly from Muggle Studies.

His eyes were wet and he wiped them hastily.

_Don't be ridiculous._

On the other wall there were two black and white posters, portraying young men who looked like soldiers. On one was written " _never was so much owed by so many to so few_ " and on the other " _their sacrifice, our freedom_ ".

He tried to take a deep breath but he felt as if someone had just laid a stone on his chest.

_Stop this nonsense, Percy. Now._

Ah, there was a large bookcase. Exactly what he needed to distract himself.

There were several huge Charms books that looked quite challenging, with titles like _"Theory of protective Charms_ " by Alexius Walmund or " _The Complete Guide to Atmospheric_

 _Charms_ " by Thora Frost. Then there were Muggle-looking books and some of their old Hogwarts textbooks and...

… a small bottle containing a black powder caught his eye and he looked closer at it. The label said " _Weasley's Wizard Wheezes - Peruvian Instant Darkness Powder_ ".

He noticed that the books' titles were blurred and wiped his eyes again. But this time new tears were there as soon as the first ones were dried.

_Get a grip. You are making a spectacle of yourself._

He heard Audrey's footsteps behind him but he didn't turn.

"There we go. Tea with milk for you and tea with lemon for me. And there are some…"

She fell silent. He heard her put the tray on the table and then her steps approaching.

"Sorry" he whispered, still not turning to her.

"It's alright"

She didn't touch him. She was probably trying to figure out whether he wanted to be touched or not.

"Everything is so confused" he said slowly. Maybe, if he concentrated on talking, he would regain control. "Once I was sure about everything. I knew what I had to do, what I believed. And it turns out that what I believed was almost completely wrong and that I made a mess with everything. And part of the mess cannot be fixed anymore"

His voice as becoming unsteady and he stopped to take a breath. He didn't know why he kept talking, he was just unable to shut his mouth.

"I've always had a tendency to think over things but now it's… it's unbearable. Every night, I spend hours dwelling on any single thing I've said or done, on any single thing I am going to say or do, both at home and with my family and... _I just can't take it anymore_!"

His voice broke and he noticed too late that he had lost it. He covered his face with both hands, trying to muffle the sobs.

_Brilliant, Percy, congratulations._

He tried to regain control but he knew that it was useless. There was a reason why he didn't want to loose it - he cried rarely, but when he let himself do it then it was very hard to stop.

Audrey touched his back lightly and somehow the contact made him sob even harder. She rubbed his shoulder for some moments, then she hugged him without a word. He felt her hands stroking his back without a pattern, her breathing slow and steady.

"I'm sorry..." he whispered miserably.

"Don't be"

He tried to speak again but he couldn't say a word straight.

"We'll talk later" she said soothingly.

_This was utterly ridiculous. He was soaking her hair with his tears. He was making a spectacle of himself. And afterwards he would be a nervous wreck._

Now she was holding him tight and he noticed that he was holding her tight, too. He didn't want to let go of her...

After what felt like centuries, he managed to stop sobbing but she kept holding him.

_How was he going to look at her in the eye? She had been his secretary until the day before, she wasn't supposed to see him like this._

"Let's sit down and have some tea. I kept it warm with a charm" she murmured eventually. He reluctantly disengaged himself from her hug, trying to avoid her eyes.

"Thank you. I apologise for what you have to see" he said stiffly, wiping his eyes.

"There is no need to be sorry, Percy. I'm not going to think any less of you because you're hurting. You don't have to manage everything on your own"

He took some sips from his mug, looking intently at the wall opposite them.

"And I'm here if you want to talk. Maybe the dwelling will get better if you share it with someone else"

_He knew that. He had lost control and now he wouldn't be able to stay silent. The bottle would pour until it was empty._

"That evening, before the battle... I arrived at Hogwarts and immediately stumbled upon my family" he said softly. "Fred told me that I was a _ministry-loving, family-disowning, power-hungry moron_ and then he... he welcomed me back. And that was the only reproach I've heard from my family so far. I tried to split Ron and Harry apart and they don't reproach me. I missed Bill's wedding and I never visited him after he was hurt, and not a resentful word from him. Once I believed that I could lecture my siblings, that I was an example, that I was... better than them. Now they would have every right to lecture me and they don't"

Percy swallowed a couple of times, trying very hard not to cry again.

"I had a conversation with my father. I thought that he would reprimand me but he didn't. My mother? I don't know how many times she must've cried because of me. Not one single reproach from her. It's just too good to be true and I wonder when they'll start seeing me as a bighead again"

Audrey took his hand and squeezed it.

"I reckon they won't" she said "You are close to them now, probably more than you've ever been before. And maybe they didn't reproach you because now they see you in a different light. And you're not a bighead, Percy - maybe you were as a teenager, but not now"

Percy considered her words. Until that moment, nobody had told him so openly that he had changed. Yes, the people who were close to him certainly noticed that he was different from the self-entitled teenager he had once been. Yes, Kingsley had mentioned that he wasn't the same person anymore. But nobody had stated it so clearly, in a way that didn't leave him guessing, and Merlin knew if words were important for Percy.

"People at the Ministry still treat me as if I were one. There are still so many people… who barely speak to me, who barely look at me..." he wiped his eyes again.

"I wonder how many of these people were right from the beginning and how many of them helped Muggle-Borns and fought as you did in the end!" she said heartily. She was still holding his hand and she squeezed it again. "Besides, Kingsley hired you again and he doesn't treat you like that"

"I wonder whether he hired me because he's friends with my family" whispered Percy.

"No, he didn't" said Audrey, categorical "I happen to know that he had a meeting with Gilbert Wimple of Experimental Charms, my future boss, and he told him how great and efficient and accountable you are"

Percy blushed furiously. Yes, Kingsley often praised his work but it was nice to know that he was genuinely happy with him.

"He knows me since the time when I worked for Fudge. He knows what a moron I have been… and he is nothing but kind" he whispered.

"Kingsley is kind because he knows how much you have changed and how much you have gone through. And he works with you everyday, so maybe he's more reliable than people who haven't spoken with you in years"

_She was really sweet and caring. He didn't feel like he had just broken down in front of her._

_Maybe he should just listen to Fred and ask her out._

_But not now._

"You are very hard on yourself" said Audrey calmly. "Maybe once you thought too highly of yourself, but thinking too lowly of yourself is just as inaccurate. You are a kind man, Percy. You've made mistakes, you know that and you have been trying to improve for quite a while now. And your errors will make you a better person, they already have"

His eyes were dry when he turned to her with a small smile.

"Thank you"

They finished their tea chatting about Audrey's books and posters until Percy took his leave at 5 p.m.

"Are you sure that you wish to come tonight? I'll understand if don't feel like coming"

"I feel like coming" he said with a quiet smile.

Yes, he still didn't like to loose control in front of other people. He still felt embarrassed. But he also felt better than he had in ages.

He didn't know whether it was because Audrey's point of view had convinced him or because she had been so gentle and accepting. He knew that he would still dwell and have sleepless nights and nightmares.

But now he knew that he could face it.

_(continues… )_


	18. What the World Needs Now is Love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Audrey tells Percy something he didn't expect to hear.  
> Percy attends Harry's birthday party and has some interesting conversation…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The title is inspired by the song "What the world needs now is love" by Jacke DeShannon

**July 18th, 1998**

_He couldn't believe his ears._

A few hours before, Percy had met Audrey, Kingsley and Lavinia at the Leaky Cauldron. The pub was impossibly full but luckily Kinsgley had been wise enough to reserve a table.

Audrey was _stunning_. She wore a black sheath dress and -for the first time since he knew her- she had her hair down.

Percy loved long and thick hair and Audrey's hair was a cascade of warm, rich gold.

_Great, make her catch you staring again, Percy!_

They chatted pleasantly in front of four glasses of the house's finest mead. Lavinia told some stories about her exile in Norway and Kingsley chatted about his days at Hogwarts (Percy didn't know that he was a Hufflepuff, by the way).

"Audrey, there's something I've always wanted to ask you" said Kingsley, turning to her "How did you find out about Potterwatch?"

She leaned back on her chair "Quite frankly, it was a stroke of luck. You know, during the Muggle World War II the BBC aired radio programs to support people who fought against the Nazis. I was hiding near Inverness and I felt lonely… then I thought that maybe the Wizarding World had something similar to the BBC radio. It was more a wish than an expectation, but since I needed to occupy my mind with something I started working with my radio. I needed several days but I found you" she concluded with a smile.

Kingsley was staring at her with wide eyes.

"You might not believe it but that's where I took the idea from"

_"Sorry?!"_

"While working for the Muggle Prime Minister, I studied recent Muggle history extensively and I discovered about the BBC radio. After so many people went into hiding, I figured out that a radio program would be a good way to reach them" he explained.

Percy wondered whether his father knew that. He would be delighted to know that Kingsley had been inspired by a Muggle idea…

It was pleasant to sit there with them, enjoying light chat and a good mead. A year before, he would've never dreamed of it. His life had consisted of working for a corrupt Ministry and going back to an empty house with no prospect of meeting friends or family.

Yes, one year before Fred had been alive, and that made a huge difference. _One year before he hadn't had to mourn a brother..._

Audrey was glancing worriedly at him and he noticed that he had been lost in his thoughts for a while. He smiled at her to show that he was fine and joined the conversation again.

They left the Leaky Cauldron an hour later. It was a warm evening and Percy was sorry to leave the coolness of the pub - also because it meant that soon he would be saying goodbye to Audrey.

"I'll be on my way, my husband is likely waiting on me for dinner" said Lavinia. "It has been great to work with you, have fun with your new job" she added, shaking Audrey's hand.

She bade goodbye to everybody and Disapparated with a pop.

"It's too bad that you are leaving, you have been very helpful. Come to visit sometimes!" said Kingsley, shaking her hand as well. After a moment, he had Disapparated too.

_Now they were alone._

"You've done a great job" said Percy.

_He sounded horribly pompous. A few hours before, he had been crying his eyes out in her arms and now he talked like a professor!_

He fell silent and she just regarded him seriously, without answering.

_Find some courage and ask her out! At worst she will say no but she will be kind!_

But the words just didn't come out. Yes, he knew that she would not laugh in his face but he just... he had just started to feel slightly better and he didn't want to face a pull back right now.

That awkward silence was becoming horrible. _But what should he say?_

"Listen, Percy" she began quietly. She looked almost uneasy. "I know that you're having a hard time and I don't want to sound insensitive but I... I would really like to see you again"

_He gaped at her. She would like what?!_

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to say something hurtful…" she said hastily. She had clearly interpreted his shocked reaction in the wrong way.

"Oh, no, no!" he replied hoarsely, finding his voice again "I... I would like to see you again, too, if you must know. I just... I wasn't expecting to hear this now"

_Fred had seen this coming, almost three months before and without having seen them together._

She smiled softly at him.

"I know that you have enough to deal with at the moment and I don't want to push things. But when you feel like seeing me, for any reason... you know where to find me"

He was still staring at her with wide eyes. Had he just heard what he believed he had heard?

"Yes. I know where to find you. Thank you" he murmured.

Standing on her toes, she kissed him lightly on the cheek and her hair brushed against his nose. He swallowed, trying desperately to find something to say.

"Goodnight" she whispered with a smile.

"G-Goodnight" he stuttered. He heard a faint pop and she wasn't there anymore.

The flowery scent coming from her hair was still in his nostrils. He stood in the middle of the street, not entirely sure that his legs would answer to him.

 _He couldn't believe his ears,_ Percy thought a couple of hours later, lying in his bed. He would have liked to think back about what she had said but he fell asleep immediately.

OOO

**July 31st, 1998**

"Bye! See you at Harry's birthday!" called Kingsley, walking by Percy's office door.

"Yes, see you at the Burrow!" replied Percy.

He checked his to-do list and Kingsley's schedule for the following week one last time and then closed both in his desk drawer. He was about to go when he heard a soft knock.

Audrey stood in the doorway, smiling at him. She was gorgeous in that dark blue dress... _she was always gorgeous, now that he thought of it._

"Hello!" he exclaimed, standing eagerly and hitting his knee against his desk's leg. _Why was he so clumsy whenever she was around?_

He smiled widely, ignoring the pain in his knee.

"I haven't spotted you in several days. I wanted to make sure that you're not overworking" she said, walking in.

"When am I _not_ overworking?" he asked back.

"You do have a point" she replied with a laugh.

_Ask her out. Ask her out now!_

"Are you free tomorrow?" he asked gingerly.

"Sure. Do you have anything on your mind?"

"Er... I..." he stuttered.

_Why did he always stutter? It wasn't the first time he asked a girl out!_

"Well, I have something on my mind. There is a place I would like to show you, I reckon you'd like it" she said.

_Well done, Percy. Next time make sure that you have some sort of plan before asking her out!_

"Which place?"

"It's a surprise. Come to my place at 2 p.m. and we'll Apparate together"

OOO

Half an hour later, Percy was sitting contentedly in his parents' garden. He had a date with Audrey on the following day, he was going to celebrate a joyous occasion and he was going to enjoy two days away from his annoying new secretary. Let's not think of him now - he's so infuriating!

He hadn't known what he could give Harry for his birthday. Eventually he concluded that a box of sweets from Honeydukes was always welcome and he had settled on that.

George, who was going to reopen the shop in a couple of weeks, was talking to Bill.

"Thankfully, Lee volunteered to help me on the weekends and on the last days of August. Otherwise I couldn't manage. I already have a bunch of reservations"

"What is Lee Jordan doing now?" asked Percy. He hadn't seen Lee since Fred's funeral.

"He works at the Firebolt company and he will soon start commenting Quidditch matches for the Wizarding Wireless Radio" explained George. "Speaking of which, he told me that there is a friendly match between Puddlemere United and the Falmouth Falcons tomorrow at 3 p.m. Anybody cares to come?"

"Sounds good" said Harry to Ginny.

"What about you, Percy? Oliver could use some support from his friends" said George.

"I would like to come but I have a previous engagement" said Percy quietly, hoping that his sibling would not ask more.

_Sure._

" _Previous engagement_? Is that your way to say that you have a date?" asked George.

Suddenly, Percy noticed that everybody was listening, including Kingsley, who had joined them for dinner.

"Drop it" he said, starting to blush.

"That means yes" observed Ron.

 _How very perceptive_ , thought Percy rolling his eyes.

"Who is she?" asked Ginny.

"Ginny, let your brother be" said his father good-naturedly, but his mother slapped him on the arm. She wanted to know as well.

"Wait, is she that former secretary of yours? What was her name again?" questioned George. _In front of Kingsley, of all people. He would think that Percy had flirted with his intern..._

"Nice try, but I've never told you her name" Percy replied haughtily.

"Ah, but that means I was right!" exclaimed George, delighted.

"Enough of this" cut in his father "He'll tell us about her when he'll feel like it"

But Percy wasn't annoyed at George. His brother had never been in such a playful mood since Fred had died, it was wonderful to see him like this.

They had already eaten his mother's delicious apple pie when Kingsley announced that he had to go. Percy accompanied him to the door, he needed to talk to him.

"I would like you to know that I haven't dated my secretary..." he started, but Kingsley lifted his hand.

"Percy, I know that without you telling me. Anyway, she's not your secretary anymore" he concluded with a smile. He walked away waving at him and soon Disapparated.

Maybe because he was thinking about his date with Audrey on the following day, but Percy had never felt so fine in ages.

It was nice to think that, after the party, he would go to sleep in his old bedroom and he would be awoken on Sunday morning by the house's sounds - his mother making breakfast, the old demon wailing in the attic, his siblings talking loudly to each other...

He took a moment to consider his life in the last couple of weeks.

He had been sleeping more or less decently. Yes, he was still awoken by terrifying nightmares sometimes, but when he went to bed he knew that he would not lie awake for hours.

He was starting to think that maybe his family was not going to find him obnoxious any soon. He was starting to believe Kingsley whenever the Minister praised him.

And then there was Audrey. Since that drink with Kingsley and Lavinia in Diagon Alley, they had never met outside the Ministry, but the realisation that she really wished to see him again had given his heels wings.

_He was starting to feel fine._

Yes, his new secretary was mildly annoying. Well, he was quite annoying, to be honest. But he could live with it, and maybe with time he coul...

"Are you with us, Percy?" asked Bill.

"Sorry? Uh-oh, yes, yes… just some little inconvenience at work" he answered lightly.

"Percy complaining about work? Now _that's_ new!" said Ron.

"Oh no, I'm not complaining about work. Just some... little trouble with my new secretary, but it's a matter of time..."

"You told us that your secretaries are fresh from Hogwarts. Must be someone we know" said Ginny.

_How silly of him! Every time he lost his countenance, he made a mess._

"Who do we know who is completely obnoxious?" asked Ron, looking around.

"Zacharias Smith?" suggested Ginny.

"No" cut in Bill "He works at Gringotts' and he's a git"

"Then who…?"

"I think" said Harry solemnly "I think I know who that is". He waited until everybody was looking at him, then said "Cormac McLaggen!"

Ron, Hermione and Ginny started laughing and they laughed even louder when they understood from Percy's expression that Harry way right.

"You have to work _one year_ with McLaggen?! I'm so sorry for you, Percy!" said Ron, trying to regain some sort of composure.

"Percy, could you give him a hard kick in the shins? Or jinx him, as you please" asked Harry wiping his eyes.

Everybody rolled with laughter again.

"I can't promise you that, but I might end up doing it" replied Percy helplessly.

"Remember that time when he cracked your skull, Harry?" asked Ron.

"Of course not, that's the kind of thing you forget" snorted Harry "Oh, don't worry, it wasn't intentional" he added, looking at Percy, who had turned white.

Harry told Percy about McLaggen short and thunderous experience as Gryffindor's goalkeeper. Percy hadn't trouble recognising his new secretary in Harry's words - he was exactly like that: arrogant, self-opinionated and not open to critical remarks. But Harry's words made him think as well.

_Had he been like Cormac as a teenager?_

He could see some similarities. Yes, he was probably more efficient and he had the impression that he was kinder than Cormac - on the other hand, Cormac probably wasn't as nervous and easily hurt as Percy was. _But there were some similarities._

He felt sorry for him. He was sure that Cormac didn't really wish to appear as obnoxious as he did, he probably just didn't know how to be less annoying. Even Percy didn't know how to be less annoying sometimes…

Maybe, instead of seeing Cormac as a nuisance, he could see the situation as an opportunity. He didn't know how yet, but he would figure out.

Lying in his bed, Percy listened to the owls hooting outside. He liked living in the countryside, especially at night. The loud noise of London's night traffic couldn't reach him here.

 _I'll certainly live in the countryside if and when I'll have a family of my own_ , he thought. And then he couldn't help but thinking about Audrey.

_Take it easy, Percy. You have just a date tomorrow, you're not going to marry her next week._

_Yes, yes, of course._ Still, he couldn't help but smiling.

_I wonder where she'll bring me tomorrow._


	19. I Let Myself Fall

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Percy and Audrey go on their first date.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The title is inspired by the song "I let myself fall" by Rosie Thomas

**August 1st, 1998**

On the following day, Percy went downstairs to find his mother and Harry making breakfast.

"Would you mind helping Harry, dear? I have to feed the chickens" told him his mother, wiping her hands on her apron.

Percy started grilling tomatoes while Harry was busy with sausages.

"Is everybody else still sleeping?" he asked.

"No, your father's gardening and George is doing some kind of work for the shop"

Percy smiled to himself. _So now George was the one working from home…_

_Now that you are lone with Harry, there's something you owe him._

"I've never had a chance to… apologise to you" he said, rapidly checking the tomatoes.

"There is no need to" answered Harry, confused.

"Oh no, there is. I had known you for years and I should've known better. I am thankful that you didn't give up"

While talking, Percy felt free of a burden. He had intended to say those words since the Battle, maybe even before the Battle.

"t's alright, really" said Harry, putting the sausages on a plate. Percy noticed that he was doing it the Muggle way.

"Other people who knew me didn't believe me" Harry went on "I had a nasty fight with Seamus Finnegan on the first day of our fifth year. He called me a nutter and we came close to hitting each other. Very few students believed me.. I guess the main reason why many started believing me was that Umbridge was so awful"

Percy silently agreed with him.

"At first I was furious at people who didn't believe me and disappointed when it came from people who knew me. But in the end people make errors… I mean, even Dumbledore was friends with Grindelwald. Really, it's alright"

The conversation was interrupted by Hermione and Ginny walking into the kitchen.

Percy wasn't surprised to see Ginny kiss Harry. _It was not exactly a secret. But if someone had told him the first time he had seen Harry and Ginny together…_ he shook his head.

Soon they were joined by the rest of the family and they enjoyed a long Saturday breakfast.

Upon leaving, Percy had to face the usual discussion with his mother, who always tried to supply him with every kind of food.

"Make us proud with the lady, Perce, whatever her name is!" George cried after him just before he Disapparated.

OOO

At 2 p.m., Percy Apparated in front of Audrey's door in Castlemartin. He hadn't seen the house from the outside on his previous visit and he noticed that it was a small, one floor cottage with climbing plants on the walls and roof. Not knowing where she wanted to take him to, he had settle for Muggle trousers and a shirt. His heart racing, he knocked on the door.

After a moment, Audrey appeared. She had her hair down and wore a dress - _again. She was just stunning._

"Hi" said Percy "you look very… er... charming"

_Great, let's start cutting sorry figures from the beginning, Percy._

"Thank you!" she answered brightly "Good that you dressed Muggle. Shall we?"

She outstretched her hand and he took it.

A moment later, Percy found himself standing in Diagon Alley.

"Uh... why is that good that I dress Muggle in Diagon Alley?" he asked uncertainly.

Audrey laughed.

"We are in Diagon Alley just because I needed to Apparate in London. Let's get out of here, we'll need to take the underground"

Percy had never taken the underground before and followed Audrey's example, trying his best not to look odd. They got off at the Tottenham Court Road underground station and walked for some minutes until they were in front of a large building. Audrey turned to him.

"Where are we?" he asked. The building had high, white columns and looked a little like an Ancient Greek temple.

"This is the British Museum" she answered eagerly "I was positive that you had never been here and I think you might like it"

_Oh, she had to be the woman of his life…_

"That's great! I've been in the History of Magic Museum in Godric's Hollow but I've never visited a Muggle Museum before" he answered excitedly.

Inside the museum, Audrey took two tickets and two tickets and headphones.

"Wait, you shouldn't be paying! I asked you whether you were free in the first place" he said.

"Why not? I have a wage, you know. Besides, the ticket is free"

"But the headphones…"

"I'm not going bankrupt for two headphones, Percy. If you are feeling so bad, you can pay tea later"

That meant that they would spend some other time together after visiting the museum. Percy couldn't say that he was complaining… 

"Very well, I give up. What are the headphones for?" he asked.

"They are an audio guide to the museum, I will show you how they work"

She took him by the hand and led him in front of a giant map of the museum. It was clearly enormous, they would not have time to visit it in its entirety.

"Is there something you would like to see?" she asked.

He looked at the map. Yes, he knew about Ancient Egypt, Ancient Greece and the Middle Ages but not from a Muggle perspective.

"I think I will trust your judgement. I am not really familiar with this"

Audrey smiled and guided him to the rooms dedicated to Mesopotamia.

Percy had a wonderful time, although the museum was only partly responsible for it. He liked to see Audrey beside him, to look at her while she observed a piece of art with a concentrated brow, to feel her fingers brush against his ones, to be able to smell her perfume. And she had been right about the museum, he loved it. There were so many interesting things he didn't know about and the audio guide on the headphones was great. He felt sorry when he noticed that the closing time was approaching and they had to leave.

"This was... wow. We must come here again!" he told Audrey excitedly once they were outside.

_Hold on, Percy. Who told you that you are going to have a second date?_

But Audrey was as excited as he was: "Definitely! I love this place and there are so many other great museums to visit!"

She had the thirst for knowledge and the joy of learning which were so purely Ravenclaw. And he just wanted to touch that wonderful golden hair… now there was a gentle breeze

_and the hair was dancing around her face…_

_… he was staring at her again._

"Do-do you know a tea-room in the vicinity?" he asked, noticing that he was blushing again.

Soon they were sitting in a nice little tea room next to Russell Square. She chatted enthusiastically about the British Museum, the National Gallery and other museums she liked, while he talked about the Museum of Magic in Godric's Hollow and the many interesting things that were kept there.

Then they started sipping their teas, in a comfortable silence.

"You know…" she said conversationally "I had a little crush on you at Hogwarts"

He choked on his tea and started coughing, noticing that his face was becoming very warm.

_"Really?!"_

"Yes. It started when I was appointed a Prefect and you were Head Boy. You instructed us in the Prefects' carriage on the Hogwarts Express and I thought you were… nice" she explained.

"I... er... I've never… noticed" he said, trying to catch his breath again.

"Of course you haven't, I didn't want to show it! It was just a crush and you were already dating Penny Clearwater" she explained "After some time I got over it"

Percy didn't know what to say. He had never considered himself to be a heartbreaker. Yes, he was kind and he supposed that he wasn't ugly. But he had always lacked the qualities that made other boys popular among girls: he wasn't dashing or spontaneous or funny. With girls, he had always played the "man to marry" card, showing that he was serious, reliable, hard-working…

"Are you lost in your world?" she asked playfully.

"Yes, sort of" he admitted "I wasn't expecting to hear that"

 _Girls who met him for the first time usually found him stuffy, not nice_ , he thought. But he kept the thought to himself.

"Well, I've always had a soft spot for..." she went silent, trying to find the fitting word.

"Bookworms?" he suggested. She laughed and he laughed with her. He couldn't remember the last time he had laughed like this.

"In a way, yes. I just... I've always liked boys who took things seriously... I still do" she said quietly.

Percy felt a very warm sensation in his chest. He understood what she was trying to say and he would've liked to say something similar but he didn't know how.

He just smiled heartily at her and she smiled back.

_It was alright. He could be like this with her. He could be unspontaneous he could be clumsy when he was nervous and she wasn't annoyed at him!_

_She had that wonderful Ravenclaw acceptance - probably it wasn't a coincidence that his only other girlfriend had been a Ravenclaw too._

They spent quite some time chatting in that tea room. She talked excitedly about her job and he told her about his interest in magical transportation. He told her about his older brothers whom she didn't know, she told him about her only brother and the way they were close although he was five years younger. Until, somehow, they started talking about exes. Percy couldn't even remember how it had happened.

"I knew that Rolf wanted to be a Magizoologist but I hadn't realized that he intended to travel all over the world and even to move abroad. When he started speaking about it, I sort of… I wish to settle down and I don't enjoy frequent changes, I am not an adventurous type. And I didn't want to build a family abroad because my family is Muggle, travelling isn't easy or cheap for them. We tried to find a compromise but eventually... one of us would have been miserable and we broke up. I think he's in Uruguay at the moment"

She seemed lost in her thoughts for a long while, then asked softly "What about you?"

"Oh... I was dumped" he said, trying to sound casual. He didn't know how much he was supposed to say about the end of his relationship with Penny. He didn't want to repeat the things she had said to him.

Audrey stayed silent and even if he was looking down at his mug he could feel her eyes on him.

"She said that... the qualities she had previously cherished in me were not enough to build a long lasting relationship"

He couldn't bring himself to say more, to say how Penny had said that he was arrogant, difficult to stand and not a great snogger.

"It happened soon after your N.E.W.T.s, right?" she asked softly. Percy was so surprised that he looked up at her.

_Oh, no. Maybe Penny had told everything to her friends and Audrey had heard it..._

"Did she tell you that?" he questioned cautiously.

"Oh, no. I just sat with the two of you in the Prefects' carriage at the end of term. You weren't even sitting next to each other, something was clearly off"

"Ah..." he said, relaxing. "Yes. Actually, it was on the very last school day. Great way to end it" he added.

They went on chatting until they noticed that the tea room was about to close.

Reluctantly, he stood and they walked back together to the underground station.

Half an hour later, they were walking into Diagon Alley.

"Should I see you home?" he asked.

She laughed.

"Maybe I should see you home, since you live here!"

"Yes" said Percy "that probably makes more sense. But... why did you ask me to come to Castlemartin and then Apparated here again?"

She turned to him, confused.

"I assumed that you would be spending the weekend at your parents'. You said something about Harry Potter's birthday yesterday"

"Yes, I was there but I came back after breakfast. My siblings figured out that I had a date and it was sort of… well… they didn't need to know that"

Percy mentally slapped himself. _Why did his siblings not need to know that he had a date? Why had he said that? Maybe Audrey would be offended!_

But she laughed again.

"I've had a wonderful time with you today" he said quietly once they were in front of his door. "And if you… if you wish, I would really like to see you again"

Audrey looked intently at him and for a moment he feared that she would say no.

But she stood on her toes, propped on his shoulder and kissed him.


End file.
